honeycutt8729

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Offline (the 04/04/2016 at 10:58pm)

honeycutt8729

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honeycutt8729
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 May 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5124
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About honeycutt8729 : I'm Kristin.
I read fml because I love to laugh.
I love working out.
Always in a good mood.
I love to cook.
I love the correct use of grammar and punctuation.
I have the perfect life with a supportive fiancé who cares about my happiness.

honeycutt8729's page activity

Visits<b>tiitsmcgee</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 11:58am<b>pred8885</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 9:23am<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 1:16am<b>felicianchris</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 11:27pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 9:23pm<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 9:21pm<b>Kuibe</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 3:18am<b>freeport_aidan</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 6:23am<b>Michaelaarnett</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 12:54pm<b>Rich531</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 7:07pm<b>siuolwt</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 4:13am<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 12:54pm<b>tfowl61692</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 6:28pm<b>Augenna</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 1:52am<b>mrowl96</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 2:52pm<b>Yadiloh52</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 2:14pm<b>jozephizcoolz</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 1:43pm<b>Jpav1</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 1:25pm

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honeycutt8729's favorite FMLs

Today, it's my birthday and I received a signed vintage Beatles' album from my wife. Awesome right? It's the same album some jerk way over-bidded me for on eBay. That jerk was my wife, using my credit card. FML

by xero_art / 06/26/2009 at 5:51am / United States (North Carolina) / Money

Today, I got prostate examination for the first time. Now I can't decide what's worse, the fact that I got a boner when the doc inserted his finger, or the fact that my wife told the story to pretty much everybody we know. FML

by prostate / 06/08/2009 at 9:48am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was designing a newspaper page with a story about an aggressive female bird that was defending its nest and attacking students near some stairs. In the article were photos of victims who were attacked. We had a good laugh over it. Later, I was walking there and the bird attacked me. FML

by xacked / 06/02/2009 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend. I called him and started yelling at him over the phone. He told me that if I wanted to end the relationship I should just hang up the phone right then. Before I could say I still love him and don't want to break up, my phone battery died. FML

by noboyfriend / 05/24/2009 at 12:14am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to superglue a couple quarters to the sidewalk downtown and watch people try to pick them up. Unfortunately, street patrol was watching me glue everything the whole time. I was fined with public vandalism and defacing US currency. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I was taking an exam and I knew I was unprepared, so I wrote some cheat notes on my ankle. As I cross my legs to look at my notes, I realize I wore tall boots to class. I can't even cheat properly. FML

by Joe / 04/16/2009 at 12:21pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a softball team dinner, and I was sitting with a bunch of girls who were talking about how far they've gone with guys. One girl goes "I must be the least experienced one here, I've never even kissed a guy!" Surprised, I said "me too!" and high-fived her. She was joking. I wasn't. FML

by annonymous / 04/06/2009 at 4:35am / China (Beijing) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was in the shower, and I decided to go join him. I took all my clothes off and stepped into the bathroom. I slipped on some water, and ended up hitting my head on the toilet and passing out. When I came to, I saw my boyfriend's dad looking over me in his towel. Wrong person. FML

by showerstupid / 04/04/2009 at 4:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking down the street with my acoustic guitar on my back. I saw a girl that I like coming down the opposite way, so I decided to play my guitar to try and impress her. I started to tune it quickly, but while I wasn't paying attention, I ran into a pole. Now my guitar is cracked. FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2009 at 1:47am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was curling my eyelashes in my bathroom and while I was counting to 5 my brother flung open my door. I jumped and ended up ripping out all my eyelashes. Now I have to wait until they grow back. FML

by CPN / 03/14/2009 at 10:55am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into my house to find everyone sitting around the table and looking sad. I thought it would be a good time to crack a joke and said "What's wrong? Grandma finally die?" Turns out she had. FML

by ubbernoob / 03/05/2009 at 2:33pm / United States (Arkansas) / Health

Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML

by TahRah / 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML

by GD / 02/21/2009 at 5:11pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I needed to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone had left work, I decided that, since I AM a Jedi, my penis ought to be my lightsaber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: "At least someone is having fun!" It was my boss. FML

by lopez / 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm / Work