holyshitbatman

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Offline (the 06/27/2016 at 12:46am)

holyshitbatman

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 7 December 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2475
  • Number of comments : 77
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About holyshitbatman : procrastinators unite!!!...tomorrow (:
just your average girl looking to kill time&get badges. if you know how to get any of the secret badges, please let me know (:
also message me if you'd like. i don't bite

holyshitbatman's page activity

Visits<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 3:54am<b>rivaraven</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 6:31pm<b>Siorghra</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 10:48pm<b>ABlindMan</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 1:56pm<b>fohfuucba</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 5:16am<b>chocolateberries</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 12:47am<b>omgwthilu</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 2:49pm<b>ryannstevenn</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 5:43pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 9:19pm<b>C7</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 12:34am<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 4:03pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 2:57pm<b>PiscesNation</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 8:07am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 7:22am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 11:12am<b>mip_92</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Shan2510</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 3:27am<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 12:48pm

Fucked!<b>fohfuucba</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 11:15am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 1:22pm

holyshitbatman's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of holyshitbatman's badges

holyshitbatman's favorite FMLs

Today, after an hour of crying over a guy I like, I put on some Adele and sang along. My mom quickly took notice and came to give me advice, which was to "get over it" because he doesn't want me, and that "masturbation beats relationships hands down." Gee, thanks mom. FML

by Anonymous / 01/20/2013 at 1:22pm / New Zealand (Waikato) / Love

Today, my brother thought New Year's would be more epic and memorable if the fireworks were set off in the family room and not outside. It is memorable. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2013 at 1:12am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend took me to his house and introduced me to his parents. He also showed me around his bedroom. I think he forgot to remove the dartboard on his wall, taped to which was a swiss-cheesed printout of one of my Facebook photos. FML

by WasZumTeufel? / 12/31/2012 at 7:55pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Love

Today, while helping out at a retirement home, I had to get a book off a bookshelf. When I reached up, my watch got stuck on my shirt, resulting in my shirt lifting up. I just flashed my man-boobs to at least 20 senior citizens, and one of them even asked if he could have a feel. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2012 at 2:58am / United States / Work

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with the prettiest, most simple ring I have ever seen. I called my sister to tell her the good news, and her response was, "I know. He had me steal the ring from Claire's." FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 6:58pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, while going on a jog through the countryside, I discovered that it is actually possible outside of crappy TV shows to have a rifle leveled at you, and to be shouted at to, "Get off my land." FML

by fuckinghicks / 12/30/2012 at 6:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 1:29am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I was at church, when my mom's phone went off during the sermon. As if that wasn't humiliating enough for me, her ring tone was set to the Bed Intruder song. FML

by killme / 12/29/2012 at 5:33pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized something: when other people are drunk, they dance around and make out with people. When I'm drunk, I apparently think it's a great idea to chew on electrical cords. FML

by almostkilledmyself / 12/29/2012 at 2:30am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a disappointed boyfriend. He told me he spent an hour last night farting on my pillow to see if I would wake up with pink-eye. He's 23 years old. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2012 at 12:23pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I showed my friends the picture I drew picturing the four of us in a 'zombie apocalypse' setting. Turns out they never saw me as their friend, and I'm creeping them out. FML

by Nana / 10/22/2012 at 11:39am / Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML

by deli Shoppe / 06/27/2012 at 12:39am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2012 at 1:44am / United States / Health

Today, another of my dad's blind dates went bad, so I took him out for a beer. I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and when I came back, two guys were congratulating my dad on scoring such a hot piece of ass, and said the sex must be awesome. My dad played along with it. FML

by jonasister / 04/15/2012 at 2:43pm / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Intimacy

Today, after being filled with joy after seeing my very elderly cat finally enjoying the sun in my garden, I skipped over to give her a hug. Turns out she was taking a shit. FML

by Ew. / 04/09/2012 at 11:22am / United Kingdom / Animals