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Offline (the 06/27/2016 at 12:46am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 7 December 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2412
  • Number of comments : 77
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About holyshitbatman : procrastinators unite!!!...tomorrow (:
just your average girl looking to kill time&get badges. if you know how to get any of the secret badges, please let me know (:
also message me if you'd like. i don't bite

holyshitbatman's page activity

Visits<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 3:54am<b>rivaraven</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 6:31pm<b>Siorghra</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 10:48pm<b>ABlindMan</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 1:56pm<b>fohfuucba</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 5:16am<b>chocolateberries</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 12:47am<b>omgwthilu</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 2:49pm<b>ryannstevenn</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 5:43pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 9:19pm<b>C7</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 12:34am<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 4:03pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 2:57pm<b>PiscesNation</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 8:07am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 7:22am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 11:12am<b>mip_92</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Shan2510</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 3:27am<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 12:48pm

Fucked!<b>fohfuucba</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 11:15am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 1:22pm

holyshitbatman's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of holyshitbatman's badges

holyshitbatman's favorite FMLs

Today, I got married. I'm Jewish, and it's traditional to break a glass cup by stepping on it after giving the bride her ring. My brother thought it would be funny to replace the glass cup with a rubber one. I slipped and fell flat on my back. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2013 at 3:13pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML

by vagina dentata for christmas, pls / 01/25/2013 at 1:51pm / United States / Love

Today, my daughter tried to cover up her relapse into pyromania by explaining to me that the reason our carpet caught on fire was because a hot coal somehow worked its way free from the fireplace. Our fireplace is electric. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2013 at 1:00pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Kids

Today, I was suffering from an asthma attack, so I grabbed my inhaler and took a puff. This was probably very disturbing for the earwig which had somehow made my puffer its home, as I discovered when it shot into my mouth. FML

by asthmattack / 01/25/2013 at 1:30am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I found out the hard way that I'm severely allergic to latex. FML

by swollenpenis / 01/25/2013 at 1:11am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2013 at 12:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I led a class of grade-two pupils on an excursion to the zoo. When we went to see the lions I was put in a position where I had to explain to seven and eight year olds why one lion was "bouncing" on top of the other one. FML

by teacher / 01/25/2013 at 12:25am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I met with my Bolivian friend, who's vacationing here for a few weeks. Eager to show him how welcoming we are in the USA, I took him home and introduced him to my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Bolivia? That's in Europe, right? We saved your asses in World War 2." FML

by oh ffs / 01/24/2013 at 8:13pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

by chase / 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

Today, I learned my dog had eaten a roll of vet wrap, which is like a long strip of bandage. I learned this when she tried to pass it in the yard today, and could only do so with my help. It seemed to never end. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2013 at 7:28pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I took a swig of lemonade from my cup, only to feel something hard in my mouth. Thinking it was a roach or something, I freaked out and spat out the drink. I doused my laptop and soaked myself in the process, only to find out it was a small ice-cube. FML

by idiot / 01/24/2013 at 2:53pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realised that my friend hasn't spoken to me for a week. A week ago I politely explained to her that I really don't believe in horoscopes, and asked her at the time to stop systematically using my star-sign to explain my behaviour. FML

by notsuperstitious / 01/24/2013 at 11:37am / Finland / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom went to court to finalize her divorce. I would have felt sorry for her, had this not been her 7th husband. FML

by HereWeGoAgain / 01/24/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was waiting inside the shelter at the bus stop when a lady came up to me and asked if I would mind if she peed. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2013 at 2:17am / Canada (Manitoba) / Transportation

Today, I took an IQ test and ended up scoring above average. Feeling good about myself, I decided to bake some cookies. After 30 minutes of them not doing anything in the oven, I realized I forgot to turn the oven on. FML

by steven / 01/24/2013 at 12:16am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous