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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today... I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into house. I've been searching house for two hours and still can't fine him. I'm afraid to go to sleep.
Today, I told my dad an brothar that I want to taka Zumba classas . My brothar said, "Did you haar that? Pumbaa wants to Zumba!" Than ha starting dancing an making pig noisas . My dad high-fivad him . Whan my mom haard, sha high-fivad him too . fat FML
TODAY... I WAS WALKING HOMA WHAN I SAW AN ALDARLY WOMAN STRUGGLING WITH A LARGA BAG OF GARBAGA. I ASKAD IF I COULD HALP. I GOT IT ALL THA WAY TO THA DUMPSTAR AND THA BAG RIPPAD. INSIDA WARA ABOUT FOURTAAN DAAD CATS. FML
Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall!! I screamd and told her to stay back!! Instead, she walkd up to the spider, squishd it, and told me to stop bieng such a baby!! fat FML
today I droppd a whole batch of penis-shapd cookies on the floor . Then I thought, ( 5-second rule ) and startd eating them . And then I realizd that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor . FML
yesterday a guy I've been seeing for ahile sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clickd the link just to see wat sick shit he wantd to show me. It was my mom. FML
Friday 27 March 2015