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hogman500

Offline (the 11/01/2014 at 5:49am) | Search for a member

hogman500

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 906
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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hogman500's page activity

Visits<b>threer</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 12:37pm<b>taylor21398</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 6:09am<b>oneofthosegirls</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 10:29pm<b>Knightchaser27</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 10:50am<b>Space_Teddy</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 5:03am<b>jojosch143</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 4:05pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 10:01pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 7:20pm<b>bettyboop428</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 6:08pm<b>Anner22</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 4:54pm<b>Jharrist89</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 4:15pm

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hogman500's favorite FMLs

Today, I got drunk, broke up with my girlfriend, and sent my grandma nude pics, thinking she was my girlfriend. Well, ex-girlfriend. FML

#21241704
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20287) - you deserved it (38687)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by Kev (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

#21241122
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37177) - you deserved it (3475)

On 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43599) - you deserved it (16572)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42717) - you deserved it (9366) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40724) - you deserved it (25670)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger and whispering sweet promises to it. FML

#21234388
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35068) - you deserved it (3322)

On 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm - work - by weirded out (man) - United States (California)

Today, I managed to punch a customer's child as he walked around the corner just as I enthusiastically pointed his mother in the direction of what she was looking for. FML

#21217892
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39248) - you deserved it (3842)

On 07/23/2014 at 12:04am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52980) - you deserved it (7994)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML

#21199559
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44483) - you deserved it (7087)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to my young niece hammering a metal cookie cutter into my leg. I'll have a teddy bear shaped scar for the rest of my life. FML

#21199181
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50476) - you deserved it (4837)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:40am - kids - by umerin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my cousin asked me what it's like to be so fat. I chastised him and said that was a rude thing to ask. He apologized, then asked me what it's like to be such a pussy. He didn't stop until he, a 10 year old kid, had reduced me, a 26 year old woman, to tears. FML

#21190580
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41723) - you deserved it (7467)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:57pm - kids - by keelah (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42978) - you deserved it (6133)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend informed me of how I had really hurt his feelings. Apparently, not wanting to be sent a photo of his poop is hurtful. FML

#21188342
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39578) - you deserved it (5281)

On 06/25/2014 at 7:38pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)



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