Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hk

Search for a member

hk
  • Town/Country : Ottawa, Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 27 July 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 273531
  • Number of comments : 345
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About hk : I'm a regular college girl, studying law in Ottawa. :D

hk's last visitors

CrookedNipplesEl_MojiiitoladystateEzelliannahareBaller_Bobireply_wlyricseuphoriagorillazFedergirl_emely_29_

hk's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of hk's badges

hk's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking my husky when she saw a cat and bolted toward it. I couldn't let go of the leash because my hand was tangled up. Forced to run along, I ran into a parked van at full sprint. I lost my dog, broke two ribs and have to pay for the dent in the van. FML

#487128
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84652) - you deserved it (8486)

On 03/20/2009 at 11:08am - animals - by frame (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I slept over at my friend's house but forgot my glasses. When I woke up in the morning, I came out of his room and forcefully kicked what I thought was a soccer ball on the floor. Turns out it was his miniature poodle - it fell down a long flight of stairs. FML

#459087
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26250) - you deserved it (99367)

On 03/19/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by JohnMackSquirts (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was nude modeling for the first time for a life art class. The only criteria for the class was that I not move at all while being observed. After a few seconds I noticed a really hot girl drawing me. I got a hard on. FML

#442796
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68327) - you deserved it (22516)

On 03/18/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Opplyst11 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I woke up at three in the morning when two cops busted in the door to my apartment and a frantic voice on my cellphone saying "Sir? Sir? Are you all right? Sir?" Turns out I had been having a nightmare and dreamed I called 911. I actually did. FML

#440568
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63455) - you deserved it (7691)

On 03/18/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by Miller_Time (man) - United States

Today, I was watching this TV show where a man was describing how much he loved this woman, how he made every opportunity to see her, and how he loved her in a way nobody else could. I smiled, because that's exactly the way I feel about my crush. Then I realized the program was about stalkers. FML

#438513
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64872) - you deserved it (22857)

On 03/18/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by bluten (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant, I'd forgotten my glasses and had a migraine. I was straining my eyes, squinting and rubbing my temples to alleviate my migraine. I was kicked out of the restaurant and banned henceforth because my waitress thought I was mocking her eyes. FML

#433810
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71855) - you deserved it (9009)

On 03/18/2009 at 2:22am - misc - by lemonjuice (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was walking up to girlfriends house when her terrifying Marine Corps dad threw a football at me. Not being very athletic i surprised myself by catching it. He gestured for me throw it back and i watched it spiral wildy to the left and hit my girlfriends mom in the face. FML

#433084
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71234) - you deserved it (13180)

On 03/18/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by Jaxter (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was at my job in the Dean of Students office. My boss gave me some papers to copy. As I was copying, I read in a report that my boyfriend was written up for "cohabitation" (having a girl stay over) at my Catholic university. The report was from a weekend I wasn't at school. FML

#430681
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68344) - you deserved it (3191)

On 03/18/2009 at 12:07am - work - by germx (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML

#424816
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (320225) - you deserved it (28087)

On 03/17/2009 at 9:24pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was completely naked in my boyfriend's bed. Suddenly his mom yelled that she was coming in so that she could get to the attic. I pulled a blanket up to my neck, hoping she would think I was cold. She had to step over my bra and panties on her way to the attic. FML

#417128
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18037) - you deserved it (81657)

On 03/17/2009 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by sandy (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I decided to ask my friend to the school dance. It's one where the girls ask the guys. I spent hours placing signs down his street so he would see them on his way home. As I'm waiting in his driveway with balloons I see his car reverse and go the other direction. FML

#415998
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80756) - you deserved it (17732)

On 03/17/2009 at 4:44pm - misc - by SmileEveryday (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking through Macy's with my girlfriend. I stopped to admire a mannequin's ass, joking with my girlfriend like I was touching it. Then I slapped it. It wasn't a mannequin. FML

#408707
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39278) - you deserved it (183432)

On 03/17/2009 at 6:16am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (California)

Today, I called a priest "lame". He responded jokingly with "God will smite you!" I laughed and walked out the door. I tripped and broke my ankle. FML

#280211
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32010) - you deserved it (93917)

On 03/12/2009 at 8:07am - health - by lolzor (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: