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hjnd2396

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hjnd2396

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  • Number of visits : 112
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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hjnd2396's FML badges

50 favourites

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YDI master

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hjnd2396's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31211) - you deserved it (2512)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I sat on the bus for 3 hours stuck in traffic trying to ignore the old lady sitting next to me discreetly masturbating. FML

Today, I woke up with a swollen lump on my throat. It's extremely painful. My dad named it Gretchen and now talks about it as if it's a person. FML

#21311698
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26732) - you deserved it (2198)

On 12/04/2014 at 10:29pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend found out that I secretly watch porn while she sleeps, but she seemed to be fine with it. That's until the next day, when she got on my Facebook account and publicly shared every porn page I visit. My father even commented, "Poor choice in porn, son". FML

#21311373
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29948) - you deserved it (12691)

On 12/04/2014 at 11:31am - misc - by Red (man) -

Today, while walking home with my mom, some unoriginal cockshart in a passing car yelled at me: "Fuck her in the pussy!" It was a long, awkward walk home after that. FML

#21308349
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28784) - you deserved it (2483)

On 11/29/2014 at 8:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my five year old sister won't stop saying, "shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML

#21303585
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25754) - you deserved it (2642)

On 11/21/2014 at 10:29pm - kids - by angkal2002 - Australia

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27990) - you deserved it (3169)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40179) - you deserved it (3419)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my neighbor's five-year-old rode his tricycle into a history diorama I had spent days slaving over. When I confronted him, he just said, "Vroom vroom muthafucka." FML

Today, I found out that the girl on Facebook that helped me out of my sadness after my break-up and who I'd hopelessly fallen in love with was just a prank by my ex-girlfriend. FML

#21288808
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34451) - you deserved it (3692)

On 10/31/2014 at 12:25am - love - by facebookdeception - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

#21286701
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24346) - you deserved it (32183)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was waiting at a traffic light next to an ice cream van. The man in it turned to me and winked, making sexual hand gestures. I felt my childhood die horribly as I watched. FML

#21284616
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33028) - you deserved it (2421)

On 10/24/2014 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36972) - you deserved it (10789)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

#21281971
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36594) - you deserved it (11083)

On 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by John (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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