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hippo1234

Offline (16 hours ago) | Search for a member

hippo1234

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 38423
  • Number of comments : 100
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About hippo1234 : Ummm, I'm a female. I like bad puns and sarcasm. My dog is a Springer Spaniel.

hippo1234's page activity

Visits<b>Cortana101</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 11:54pm<b>wolfheart15</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 10:58pm<b>tehaustiebear</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 11:05pm<b>urlit</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 10:47pm<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 4:40pm<b>Wingman527</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 5:27pm<b>plaidalecki</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 2:09pm<b>MountainGiant87</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 3:32am<b>devi_916</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 11:19pm<b>Corvo_Attano</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 6:09pm<b>makitokito</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 11:36pm<b>Scarylizard1798</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 9:28pm<b>kingofthediamond</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 1:33am<b>pptm</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 7:06pm<b>darwinism</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 9:49am<b>Chazticr</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:58pm<b>julianthegreat</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:47pm<b>DetroitDov</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 11:35am

Liked!<b>Wingman527</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 11:27pm

hippo1234's FML badges

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hippo1234's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31077) - you deserved it (14741)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was taking some clean bedsheets down from the top of the wardrobe. As I pulled the top sheet down, a cat jumped onto my face, claws and all, before falling to the floor and running away. Thing is, I don't own a cat and I have no idea where in the house it has hidden now. FML

#20972130
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42742) - you deserved it (2763)

On 11/27/2013 at 2:08am - animals - by Seriously_Scaredy_Cat - United States

Today, my coworkers were bored. To solve this, they taped me to a chair and tried tickling me to death. My boss joined in. FML

#20971859
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40222) - you deserved it (4090)

On 11/26/2013 at 10:11pm - work - by tortured (man) - United States

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

#20926483
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43586) - you deserved it (4770)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by overly nationalistic redneck (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27233) - you deserved it (39081)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, in revenge for me pulling the old salt-in-the-soda prank on him, my dad showed up at my college dressed in a tight blouse and miniskirt, demanding that I come home early with him. I think I'm going to be lynched next time I go to class. FML

#20919140
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36419) - you deserved it (12294)

On 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm - misc - by HSampsON (man) - Niger (Niamey)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21634) - you deserved it (81567)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend accused me of cheating because according to him, our child does not have his hair color, eye color, or other facial features. Our son is five days old, bald and hasn't opened his eyes much. The closest thing I can probably compare him to is an old, wrinkly potato. FML

#20912171
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53665) - you deserved it (4231)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:55am - kids - by thisguy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my son's lemonade stand was robbed by a senior citizen. FML

#20908703
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47772) - you deserved it (3030)

On 10/05/2013 at 6:25pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

#20907559
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26628) - you deserved it (79451)

On 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out I was adopted when my drunk dad made a terrible Star Wars joke. FML

#20893338
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39033) - you deserved it (2473)

On 09/23/2013 at 6:49pm - misc - by theynamedmeluke (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while riding the bus, the person next to me broke into a coughing fit. Fortunately, he covered his mouth. Unfortunately, he used my arm. FML

#20889355
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37837) - you deserved it (2523)

On 09/20/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by -.- - United States (California)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55038) - you deserved it (27646)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55038) - you deserved it (27646)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, the guy on the floor above me decided it was time for a tuba jam session. Apparently optimal tuba time is 2am. FML

#20881873
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38878) - you deserved it (2586)

On 09/15/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by sleeplessinrichmond - United States (New York)



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