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hippo1234

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hippo1234

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 35794
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About hippo1234 : Ummm, I'm a female. I like bad puns and sarcasm. My dog is a Springer Spaniel.

hippo1234's page activity

Visits<b>Scarylizard1798</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 9:28pm<b>kingofthediamond</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 1:33am<b>pptm</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 7:06pm<b>darwinism</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 9:49am<b>Chazticr</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:58pm<b>julianthegreat</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:47pm<b>DetroitDov</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 11:35am<b>Rozza17</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:31am<b>Nordrag</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 1:27am<b>kittina</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 11:36am<b>somthingstupd</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 11:24pm<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 10:10am<b>oneofthosepeople</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 1:46pm<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 4:14am<b>Austrand22</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 4:08am<b>DrAvvesome13</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 3:43am<b>viperishcat</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 7:45pm<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 8:34pm

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hippo1234's favorite FMLs

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

#20558527
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30844) - you deserved it (5838)

On 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anna L. - United States (Texas)

Today, I gave my son a fork, so I could try teaching him how to eat with one. So far, he's been doing all the teaching. He's taught me that if I get anywhere near him when he has a fork, I'll get shanked. FML

Today, I finally came out to my family as a lesbian. My grandma then told me I'm just going through a phase because I finally realized I'm not pretty or skinny enough to get a man. FML

#20557644
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38834) - you deserved it (6494)

On 03/24/2013 at 6:20am - misc - by theawesome129 - Canada

Today, the kids I babysit hid from me. While I was looking for them, I stepped on multiple strategically-placed Lego bricks. When I yelped from the pain, the kids jumped out and threw soccer balls in my face. FML

#20556944
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37681) - you deserved it (4727)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my husband showed up late to my mother's funeral. He swaggered in, happily finishing off a half-eaten taco. His excuse for why he was so cheerful: "She was an in-law, honey." Good to know I married a piece of shit in disguise. FML

#20556485
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38626) - you deserved it (4845)

On 03/23/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I went to the airport after saying goodbye to my, for some reason, giggling boyfriend. I learnt why he was so cheerful when I opened my purse in front of the guards, only to find pink-furry handcuffs, and a huge dildo. They pretended not to know what it was. FML

#20556322
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50510) - you deserved it (6149)

On 03/23/2013 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

#20556205
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43131) - you deserved it (3205)

On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)

Today, I lost my dog and so I put up 'lost' signs. As I was coming back home I noticed one had been written on. It said: "Found your dog. Keeping it". FML

#20556107
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48245) - you deserved it (3073)

On 03/23/2013 at 7:43am - animals - by Hurrikhan - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, a small fly flew straight up into my nose. I spent 10 minutes trying to blow/scratch/pick it out to no avail. I can still feel it moving. FML

#20556028
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38561) - you deserved it (2659)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:17am - misc - by WTFLY (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

#20555936
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35196) - you deserved it (8959)

On 03/23/2013 at 1:44am - love - by SierraDiaz2097 - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML

#20555528
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40851) - you deserved it (6075)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was on the subway when I felt like I was going to faint. I got off the train at the next stop, walked to a bench, but fell over and passed out. When I woke up, I looked around at at least 25 people, who had stepped around me, passed out, in the middle of the platform. FML

#20554927
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32862) - you deserved it (2821)

On 03/22/2013 at 11:42am - health - by wowthanksworld - United States

Today, I found myself arguing with a 6-year-old over a game of tag. FML

#20552543
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14235) - you deserved it (30396)

On 03/20/2013 at 6:08pm - kids - by tspence - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML

#20552400
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41114) - you deserved it (4815)

On 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Tired (man) - United States

Today, we had to re-live sex ed in my college biology class. Unlike in middle school, nobody giggled incessantly. However, the guy sitting next to me stared at me intensely for nearly the whole three hour lecture. FML

#20552364
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33530) - you deserved it (3021)

On 03/20/2013 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)



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