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heylilyhey

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heylilyhey
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 721
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About heylilyhey : I made my FML account in 7th grade, so please don't judge my username. :•)

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heylilyhey's favorite FMLs

Today, at the office, my most annoying client asked me to send her a document. I have now sent it to her over 5 times, in a different format each time, and every single time she replies with, "Not in the requested format". She won't tell me what the requested format is. FML

#20709289
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43425) - you deserved it (3461)

On 06/06/2013 at 8:38am - work - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I was invited to a party. Since I rarely get invited to any, I was super pumped. Both my parents work late, so I texted a couple of people to see if I could catch a ride. It turned out everyone's cars were full. I ended up missing one of the only parties I've ever been invited to. FML

#20702631
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50493) - you deserved it (6512)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by my_only_friend (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to a local Indian takeaway, since I'm from India originally, and none of my friends speak Hindi. I went up to the counter and placed my order in Hindi with the seemingly Indian owner. He gave me a weird look and said, "Huh? Speak English, ya rimjob." FML

#20669248
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39800) - you deserved it (11270)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML

#20662624
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53441) - you deserved it (3756)

On 05/14/2013 at 8:03am - health - by toothache - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML

#20643910
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45706) - you deserved it (6112)

On 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm - kids - by me - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML

#20632198
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50840) - you deserved it (4768)

On 04/30/2013 at 3:54am - money - by ShowerGirl (woman) - United States

Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML

#20628087
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51601) - you deserved it (6383)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by a tad whipped (man) - Australia

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

#20617044
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72315) - you deserved it (3137)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

#20613218
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47080) - you deserved it (7757)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

#20612550
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31116) - you deserved it (105852)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:19am - misc - by Anon - Singapore

Today, I was small talking with an elderly man, who told me that nobody cares about him. Even though I had only known him for an hour, to try and make him feel a little better I told him I care about him. He then called me a creep, stomped his cane onto my foot, and walked off. FML

#20612321
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39978) - you deserved it (6433)

On 04/22/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by 'creep' - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was trying sell a customer a top-of-the-line surround sound system. Apparently he was aware that I work on commission, as he threatened to buy the system elsewhere unless I sang Rebecca Black's "Friday" in front of the whole store. Goodbye, self-respect. FML

#20610052
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41002) - you deserved it (4815)

On 04/21/2013 at 12:03pm - money - by a little less poor at least (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while my boyfriend was in the kitchen, he got three text messages, all of which were from "Babe 2", "Babe 3", and "Babe 4". FML

#20607010
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53841) - you deserved it (6631)

On 04/20/2013 at 8:02am - love - by How strange - United States

Today, I learned what live maggots in chocolate cake taste like. FML

#20606960
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45598) - you deserved it (6560)

On 04/20/2013 at 6:51am - misc - by MaggotMother (woman) - United States

Today, I went on my first date. Everything went great until I went to brush my date's hair over her ear like they do in the movies. I poked her dead in the eye. FML

#20606348
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40396) - you deserved it (13774)

On 04/19/2013 at 10:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)



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