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hennessy89

Offline (16 hours ago) | Search for a member

hennessy89

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 February 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3655
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About hennessy89 : I love to laugh. Especially at other people =)

hennessy89's page activity

Visits<b>bigjake</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 11:13am<b>troutbum</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 11:18pm<b>jaypskates44</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 2:01am<b>nitrams</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 4:23pm<b>codym2</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 11:39am<b>Starpom</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 6:43pm<b>suckmysarcasm</b> - the 10/23/2011 at 5:51pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 7:40am<b>Greyce</b> - the 08/29/2010 at 4:39pm

hennessy89's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of hennessy89's badges

hennessy89's favorite FMLs

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

#8158295
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32499) - you deserved it (2470)

On 02/12/2010 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

#8119072
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20709) - you deserved it (4734)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around because I'm "squishy and smell like fried chicken all the time." FML

#8099934
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10533) - you deserved it (23170)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:07pm - misc - by squishy - United States (Georgia)

Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend reached over and pinched my love handles and said "Where did this muffin top come from?". Then he sang "Do you know the muffin man?" to me. FML

#8083041
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25129) - you deserved it (7468)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:30am - misc - by muffingirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML

#8001805
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30563) - you deserved it (8493)

On 02/08/2010 at 1:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got mauled by a cat named Mr. Sprinkles. FML

#7989901
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25022) - you deserved it (5242)

On 02/07/2010 at 10:19pm - animals - by zzdug (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my son learned about various animals in school, and how they urinate to mark their territory. Apparently, the entire second floor of my house is now my son's territory. FML

#7981374
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29044) - you deserved it (2387)

On 02/07/2010 at 7:35pm - kids - by grrrr - United States

Today, I got sent to detention for saying, "that's what she said" after a girl in my class said, "push a little harder" while disecting a frog. FML

#7894652
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28865) - you deserved it (23918)

On 02/05/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by eemp - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the store with my 4 1/2 year old daughter. When we got to the cosmetics aisle, she asked what make-up was for, I told her it was to make women prettier. My daughter then told me it was a good thing I wear make-up because I was ugly and that I might scare off my husband. FML

#7891851
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30484) - you deserved it (4145)

On 02/04/2010 at 10:53pm - kids - by 102496 - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML

#7870282
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26686) - you deserved it (7331)

On 02/04/2010 at 3:29am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML

#7753235
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27893) - you deserved it (4399)

On 01/31/2010 at 7:24pm - love - by JK (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was working at IHOP serving a table full of drunk idiots. After an hour of taking care of them I went to clean up their mess to find the tip they had left me. On a napkin a girl had wrote "Here's your tip for the night: Don't play leap frog with unicorns." FML

Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML

#7501218
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41756) - you deserved it (3538)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by Funnymann - United States

Today, I found out that when you hit the neighbor's dog with your car, they might chase you a mile with a shotgun. FML

#7493759
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10303) - you deserved it (40581)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:14am - animals - by S.Bunny (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom explained the benefits of douching to me with my boyfriend right there. He began arguing with her about how the vagina is usually self-cleaning. FML

#7263265
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17634) - you deserved it (2052)

On 01/10/2010 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by CD (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



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