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hennessy89

Offline (the 07/08/2014 at 4:56am) | Search for a member

hennessy89

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 February 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2594
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About hennessy89 : I love to laugh. Especially at other people =)

hennessy89's page activity

Visits<b>troutbum</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 11:18pm<b>jaypskates44</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 2:01am<b>nitrams</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 4:23pm<b>codym2</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 11:39am<b>Starpom</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 6:43pm<b>suckmysarcasm</b> - the 10/23/2011 at 5:51pm<b>Greyce</b> - the 08/29/2010 at 4:39pm

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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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hennessy89's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39405) - you deserved it (11978)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my friends were all sharing sweet things their boyfriends had shared with them. After hearing "he says I look pretty without makeup" or "he promises we'll get married one day", I realized that the only compliment he's given me is that my laughter "sounds like a squirrel having a seizure." FML

#12552157
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27695) - you deserved it (4927)

On 08/16/2010 at 1:03am - love - by 86145 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at the pool with two boys I baby sit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML

#12498801
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30732) - you deserved it (6913)

On 08/13/2010 at 12:14pm - kids - by qtpieo1 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37428) - you deserved it (8024)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML

#8938594
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28099) - you deserved it (2384)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:31am - misc - by CreepedOut (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a wild squirrel managed to get into my house. I can't see him but I hear him in the walls. FML

#8712644
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23281) - you deserved it (2160)

On 02/28/2010 at 6:16am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking around my new school trying to figure out where to go. Then I realized I was talking to myself. Out loud. FML

#8578589
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16299) - you deserved it (9235)

On 02/23/2010 at 1:25am - misc - by itsawonderfulife (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I woke up thinking after wearing glasses and contacts all my life that I had miraculously been corrected to 20/20. Turns out I had just fallen asleep with my contacts in. FML

#8287074
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8563) - you deserved it (26677)

On 02/15/2010 at 2:44am - health - by kiriakousauce21 - Sent from mobile version

Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML

#8265301
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17282) - you deserved it (4605)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by klsdhjla (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

#8158295
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29236) - you deserved it (2202)

On 02/12/2010 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

#8119072
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14836) - you deserved it (4017)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 4-year-old niece told me she likes it when I'm around because I'm "squishy and smell like fried chicken all the time." FML

#8099934
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8845) - you deserved it (20353)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:07pm - misc - by squishy - United States (Georgia)

Today, while lying in bed, my boyfriend reached over and pinched my love handles and said "Where did this muffin top come from?". Then he sang "Do you know the muffin man?" to me. FML

#8083041
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23783) - you deserved it (7291)

On 02/10/2010 at 7:30am - misc - by muffingirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML

#8001805
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27887) - you deserved it (8106)

On 02/08/2010 at 1:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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