About hennessy89 : I love to laugh. Especially at other people =)
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37715) - you deserved it (3809)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States
Today, I was driving my eight year-old son to school when a guy cut me off, prompting me to yell "douche bag" as a reflex out of the window. Realizing my mistake, I turned to my son and told him to never, ever talk like that. His response was, "Too late, douche bag." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9018) - you deserved it (29831)
On 10/12/2011 at 8:37am - kids - by John W. (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my roommates thought I wasn't home and started talking about me. Apparently I'm a lesbian, devil worshiper, and an alcoholic. I didn't know my life was so fascinating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24886) - you deserved it (2434)
On 10/11/2011 at 11:34pm - misc - by FroggyGirl888 - United States
Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15162) - you deserved it (7500)
On 10/06/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by xoccerplaya - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20795) - you deserved it (2760)
On 10/02/2011 at 1:15am - work - by katt_is_here (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23430) - you deserved it (6436)
On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20676) - you deserved it (4063)
On 09/14/2011 at 8:21pm - kids - by unknown - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boyfriend cheated on me. But he justified it by saying she was a ginger. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25148) - you deserved it (3002)
On 09/13/2011 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)
Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23834) - you deserved it (10241)
On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was so lonely, I tried to hold hands with plastic "horror hand" I bought for Halloween. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17850) - you deserved it (6043)
On 09/13/2011 at 2:11am - love - by Penkkis (woman) - Finland (Lapland)
Today, a woman came into the gas station where I work, yelling because her credit card wouldn't read at the pump. I politely told her that I could set the pump up for a set amount, and she could swipe the card at the register. Her response: "You need Jesus." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21916) - you deserved it (1988)
On 09/12/2011 at 10:28am - work - by charliemann_ - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23103) - you deserved it (5130)
On 08/19/2011 at 9:40am - intimacy - by nerofirst - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27304) - you deserved it (6350)
On 07/25/2011 at 3:21am - health - by jgdgjyfg - United Kingdom (Rotherham)
Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33008) - you deserved it (4819)
On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24763) - you deserved it (4869)
On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)
Monday 17 June 2013
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