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hendy34

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hendy34

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 June 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 558
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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hendy34's page activity

Visits<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 11:03pm

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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hendy34's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35123) - you deserved it (6204)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got drunk, broke up with my girlfriend, and sent my grandma nude pics. thinking she was my girlfriend. Well, ex-girlfriend. FML

#21241704
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17379) - you deserved it (33455)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by Kev (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

#21240900
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21590) - you deserved it (40377)

On 08/19/2014 at 9:37am - misc - by drunk under 18 teenager (man) - Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz)

Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML

#21240474
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28869) - you deserved it (12733)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:29pm - misc - by FANZZY - United States (New York)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39240) - you deserved it (12531)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I had to awkwardly grab my pink dildo after my husband's friend asked what it was that my dog was chewing on. FML

Today, my husband wanted me to take a sleeping pill before having sex with me. Apparently I'm better in bed while half-asleep. FML

#21238124
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36591) - you deserved it (4834)

On 08/15/2014 at 11:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - China (Shanghai)

Today, I found out that my doctor wasn't kidding when he said "sudden diarrhea may occur" with my new medication. I learned this while walking my dog a mile away from my house. FML

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

#21237592
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14385) - you deserved it (67888)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by oops - United States (California)

Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He smiled broadly and said "A porn star!" FML

#21237548
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36192) - you deserved it (5868)

On 08/14/2014 at 4:44pm - kids - by cahsecuel (woman) - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I was chatting with the cute new receptionist at the gym. I told her that I would be going there more if she was there. She looked me up and down and said that I should go regardless. FML

#21237096
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32768) - you deserved it (13383)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:46pm - health - by fatty (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, a potential customer was looking at a treadmill at the fitness warehouse I work at. Once he was done testing it out, I asked him if he'd like me to order it for him. His reply? "Nah. I only had a go on it 'cause it looked like fun. Hey, but you could order one for yourself, huh, chubs?" FML

#21236566
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38911) - you deserved it (4504)

On 08/13/2014 at 10:18am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36441) - you deserved it (22181)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, was the first day my grandma has seen me since I started going to tanning beds. She is now considering taking me out of her will because I look like "a damn Indian". FML

#21235555
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24967) - you deserved it (31268)

On 08/12/2014 at 2:07am - misc - by kirstyrd - United States (Michigan)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML



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