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help_me_13

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help_me_13
  • Town/Country : houston, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 15 July 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 2958
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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help_me_13's favorite FMLs

Today, I have to follow through with the bet I lost over the Super Bowl game. I don't have a problem running a lap nude around my block, but the cops in the police station right across from my house probably will. FML

#19017961
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8523) - you deserved it (28930)

On 02/07/2012 at 12:58pm - misc - by MillyMan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

#18984075
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33534) - you deserved it (4193)

On 02/03/2012 at 1:29pm - animals - by deadhamster - United States

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

#18967800
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50862) - you deserved it (3881)

On 02/01/2012 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML

#18897176
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25239) - you deserved it (2440)

On 01/24/2012 at 6:47am - misc - by SpongeAbii2 - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. In tears, I called my best friend and told him everything. He responded with one- or two-word answers throughout, but I felt better all the same. That is, until I heard him begin to take a loud piss half-way through my sentence. FML

#18865493
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22623) - you deserved it (5496)

On 01/20/2012 at 9:31pm - love - by fuckthepopo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at Disneyland with a friend. We were watching the light show, and when Tinkerbell came out, we both started crying. Some guy noticed and called us "fucking pussies". FML

#18862954
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8757) - you deserved it (37855)

On 01/20/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by sharky (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out why I find damp spots on my favorite jacket. I appears that my dog often becomes very intimate with it. FML

#18827705
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26669) - you deserved it (2762)

On 01/16/2012 at 7:33pm - animals - by Cathy - United States

Today, my mum yelled at me for wanting to apply to university courses that she doesn't approve of. I'm applying for Biomedical Sciences and Microbiology, she's an unemployed Jehovah's Witness. FML

#17634820
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32906) - you deserved it (2492)

On 09/01/2011 at 10:40am - work - by WhatTheFaf (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I learned what it felt like to get shot in the nuts by an airsoft gun. Thank you, Mom. FML

#17634185
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26514) - you deserved it (4014)

On 09/01/2011 at 6:52am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML

#17627685
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14469) - you deserved it (50678)

On 08/31/2011 at 3:36am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML

#17625902
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29456) - you deserved it (3230)

On 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by mystupidson (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, at work, I was walking to the back office, and I didn't know my manager was following me. After I walked through the door, without looking, I reached behind me to close it. Instead of grabbing the door handle, I got a handful of his crotch. FML

#17617939
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22616) - you deserved it (2414)

On 08/30/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I noticed how big my brother's package is. If it hadn't been for the fact that my family has taken up walking around naked half the day, I never would have had to. FML

#17594618
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24678) - you deserved it (2691)

On 08/27/2011 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27798) - you deserved it (5039)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was out shopping when an old lady bumped into me and dropped her purse. Trying to help, I bent over to pick it up, at which point she battered the shit out of me, called me a "filthy thief" and threatened to open an umbrella in my ass. What the fuck has the world come to? FML

#17578977
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33615) - you deserved it (2402)

On 08/25/2011 at 5:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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