Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hellphone

Online | Search for a member

hellphone

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 6 July 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2008
  • Number of comments : 105
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

hellphone's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 7:57pm<b>YepThatsMeee</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 1:07am<b>melons</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 6:57pm<b>minnitureM</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 2:54am<b>icandothecancan</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:52am<b>Dcaxcs</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 6:09pm<b>ADC_Lover_2011</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 1:25pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 12:49pm<b>kinnocent</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 9:58am<b>thelittlemissy</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 9:59am<b>amberv61</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 9:28am<b>chocostarfish</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 11:40am<b>hellnosucka</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 5:05pm<b>Ins0mau</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 10:11pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 5:50pm<b>spongebob74</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 5:36pm<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 1:32am<b>xplicitkontent</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 10:42pm

hellphone's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of hellphone's badges

hellphone's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend why it is inappropriate for her to go skinny dipping with her male friends. FML

#18192862
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48436) - you deserved it (6717)

On 11/08/2011 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by explainer (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

#18190231
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43644) - you deserved it (7921)

On 11/08/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by lunarstrain - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my girlfriend has a new obsession: grabbing my junk and whispering in my ear the song, "Baby, Imma Be Your Motivation." Problem? I get an instant boner and she only does it in public, because it's "funny as hell." FML

#18189501
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37332) - you deserved it (7470)

On 11/07/2011 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by InstantHardOn (man) - United States

Today, I found out my soon to be ex-husband is going to be a father. We spent our entire marriage unsuccessfully trying for a baby. The mother of his unborn child isn't his new girlfriend, but someone else he was cheating on her with. Our divorce isn't even finalized yet. FML

#18184829
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33284) - you deserved it (2755)

On 11/07/2011 at 3:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I discovered that if you are being mugged, never tell your mugger you are going to call the police because he will come back and steal your phone too. FML

#18183017
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15641) - you deserved it (31373)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:53am - money - by Luke - United States (Virginia)

Today, my recently ex-girlfriend's mother called me regarding her baby girl, saying, "If you mess with the chicklet, you mess with the momma hen." I have no idea what the hell this means for my future, but I'm a bit scared. FML

#18181651
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29192) - you deserved it (4861)

On 11/07/2011 at 2:20am - love - by roadkill0321 - United States

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating on me. His response? "It's not like I liked it." FML

#18180639
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36378) - you deserved it (3408)

On 11/06/2011 at 11:43pm - intimacy - by Cat - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

#18167673
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15475) - you deserved it (34920)

On 11/05/2011 at 8:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, while cuddling up on the couch with my boyfriend, I asked him if this was his happy place too. He said, "Nah, it's in pussies." FML

#18165328
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29028) - you deserved it (9143)

On 11/05/2011 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by whatadisappointmnet (woman) - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, meeting his family for the first time. I was leaning against him when he reached around, grabbed my boobs, and started making "pew-pew" laser noises, all in front of his family. I can't believe I'm dating this child. FML

#18159889
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34824) - you deserved it (14225)

On 11/04/2011 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by Sidney (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my father decided that since I'm 21 and have never had a girlfriend, he would buy me a book on how to talk to girls. The book is written by a 9-year-old kid. FML

#18154487
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28274) - you deserved it (6189)

On 11/04/2011 at 2:57am - love - by foreverashamed - Canada

Today, I sent my grandma a naked picture instead of my girlfriend. While attempting to delete it, I sent it again. FML

#18153680
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17250) - you deserved it (49151)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:38am - intimacy - by me (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML

#18153608
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33950) - you deserved it (8276)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:29am - love - by fmlifer - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33025) - you deserved it (8880)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)

Today, I took my cat to the vet for an x-ray. They found three dollar coins in his stomach. The surgery to remove them is $600. FML

#18148198
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27461) - you deserved it (3849)

On 11/03/2011 at 4:06pm - money - by oneillrox - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: