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About hellogoodbye1996 : Someday I will overcome my struggles
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Today, I Told Mah Boyfriend I Was Pregnant. While I Was Asleep, He Drew A Face On Mah Stomach Andhen I Woke Up He Was Talking To It. He Said It Would Be Less Wierd If He Was Talking To Mah Stomach With A Face On It, Representing The Baby. According To Him, Our Child Is Going To Have A Mustache. FML
Today,hile out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clerely he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." big fat FML
fifteen minute after dinner was served, my blind date says "It's good that your smart. Not to be rude, but most girls aren't. I mean, at some point, I'm going to pull my dick looool out of your mouth and then it's good if u have something interesting to say." Check please. FML
Taday I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower , I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower , instead I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower , making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML
Today... I walkd into ma bedroom an realizd I really needd to clean it. As I startd to pick everyting up off of te floor... I trippd over a soe... slippd on a water bottle... pulld down ma soe rack an landd in ma armoire. My room is now dirtier tan it was wen I startd. FML
Today, I ran into my parent bedroom after I heard my name andhat sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parent were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to fine the key to the handcuffs. FML
Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly nieghbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML
Today... at lifeguard class... I played a victimhile mah peers strapped me to the backboard in the water. When I was strapped down... I got wood in a wet swimsuit. My hands were strapped down so I could do nothing to hide it. FML
Friday 27 March 2015