About hellogoodbye1996 : Someday I will overcome my struggles
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Today, I went to get a tattoo. I decided on getting my four month daughter's name tattooed on my upper arm. I went home to show my wife. She broke down and told me that I'm most likely not the father. It's a toss-up between her co-worker, the guy who does our lawn, several strangers and me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46911) - you deserved it (3598)
On 01/16/2011 at 9:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, we got a speeding ticket in the mail with my drunk daughter's picture on it. She was waving at the camera. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20871) - you deserved it (3816)
On 01/15/2011 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12698) - you deserved it (66451)
On 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by Gabriel A - United States (Ohio)
Today, I had a rude awakening after a traffic accident the day before. I'd fled the scene to avoid having to pay hefty damage fines. I would have gotten away with it too, if my license plate hadn't fallen off and incriminated me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5021) - you deserved it (81583)
On 01/14/2011 at 2:43pm - money - by calidumbass - United States
Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing my dad said to him was "So, how low have you kissed?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24784) - you deserved it (2946)
On 01/12/2011 at 9:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while at training with several of my co-workers, I realized I was the only woman. The only thing one of them said to me the entire day was "DUDE!" while staring at my chest as I took my coat off in the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16763) - you deserved it (2571)
On 01/12/2011 at 9:15pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I went to the bathroom and my pee split into 4 different streams, none of which actually hit the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19759) - you deserved it (5068)
On 01/11/2011 at 12:32am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, while walking on the sidewalk with my boyfriend, I slipped and fell. Not only did he not help me get up or ask if I was okay, he got mad at me for embarrassing him in public. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23881) - you deserved it (3226)
On 01/04/2011 at 10:47am - health - by clumsy -
Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19815) - you deserved it (4381)
On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while lying in bed with my fiancé, we were talking about how we'd rather die, if given a choice. I said, "I want to die in my sleep next to you." His response? "It'd be sexier if you were on top of me with your face between my legs." Cute, honey. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19438) - you deserved it (4711)
On 12/31/2010 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by legwarmer (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I finally went running to help me start losing weight. I got 50 metres before someone in a passing car shouted out "Run fatty, run". I can't work up the courage to go for a run again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30941) - you deserved it (5381)
On 12/30/2010 at 2:14am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my boyfriend of six months said he wanted to take our relationship one step further. I thought he was going to ask me to move in. He meant he wanted to fart in front of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25593) - you deserved it (4408)
On 11/27/2010 at 2:12pm - love - by ahhhboys (woman) - Romania
Today, my husband pooped the bed for the second time since we've been married. We've been married a month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39532) - you deserved it (3824)
On 10/08/2010 at 1:23am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm while wiping my own butt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14867) - you deserved it (21582)
On 08/21/2010 at 2:09am - health - by clitorasaurus (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to record us having sex and me screaming his name. He set it as my ringtone without telling me. I had my phone volume on high as I was hanging out with my family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27564) - you deserved it (7721)
On 08/18/2010 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by XxMe123xx - Sent from mobile version
Monday 20 May 2013
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