- Town/Country : Not specified
- Title : Miss
- Birth Date : Not specified
- <3 status : Single
- Number of visits : 4914
- Number of comments : 39
- Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted
About helen_ellexo : Wooo!
About helen_ellexo : Wooo!
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
by vrossie_ / 09/08/2013 at 1:56am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, a customer kept harassing me and threatening to sue me for all I'm worth because I wouldn't give her a free refill. Her reasoning was that it's "illegal" to deny people a free refill if there's still a little drink left in the cup. FML
by goshoveafuckingfrappuccinoupyourvagyoupsychocunt / 09/07/2013 at 5:43pm / United States (Virginia) / Work
by /(•'_'•)\ / 09/07/2013 at 12:59pm / United States (Missouri) / Work
Today, I came home to find my housemate cowering in the lounge corner, sobbing, hugging a bag of chips while the automatic vacuum cleaner gently bumped into him. Apparently he "mistakenly" put magic mushrooms in his sandwich instead of peanut butter. FML
by down trodden / 09/05/2013 at 3:45am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
by resurrected / 09/04/2013 at 11:59am / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Work
Today, I took my laptop to I.T. to fix my internet. Only after I left did I realise my memory technique for remembering the stages of mitosis (Iraqi penis man anally transmits chlamydia) was left as a sticky note on my desktop. The guy definitely noticed. FML
by interphaseprophasemetaphase / 09/04/2013 at 7:18am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by fml / 09/03/2013 at 2:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML
by criminal tit offender / 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I moved into my new place. It evidently used to belong to a hooker, because although I've only lived here for 9 hours, so far several different men have knocked on my door and asked if "Stephanie" is available for a good time. FML
by Anonymous / 08/31/2013 at 3:24am / United Kingdom (Redbridge) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/30/2013 at 5:05pm / United States (New York) / Money
by Anonymous / 08/23/2013 at 7:30pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I mentioned on Facebook that I'll be out of town over the weekend, because I am attending my grandmother's funeral. I soon got comments saying "Pics or it didn't happen" and "Killed her for the inheritance, eh?" followed by a solitary "LOLLL". FML
by Anonymous / 08/23/2013 at 6:52pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
Today, at work, two teenage girls caused a huge scene and told me to get lost, after I asked if they needed any help. Their reasoning: they didn't want to be helped by "someone who doesn't have a thigh gap." FML
by Hannahb17 / 08/23/2013 at 6:21pm / United States (Arizona) / Work
by Anonymous / 08/23/2013 at 10:29am / United States / Love
by NotInterested / 08/23/2013 at 2:23am / United States / Miscellaneous