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helen_ellexo

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helen_ellexo

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1357
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About helen_ellexo : Wooo!

helen_ellexo's page activity

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helen_ellexo's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML

#20819538
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48498) - you deserved it (4854)

On 08/03/2013 at 11:29pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was convinced by my friends to watch an episode of the American TV show "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo". They said it was bad, but I didn't anticipate having a full-blown panic attack ten minutes into it. FML

#20819060
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40304) - you deserved it (8813)

On 08/03/2013 at 5:57pm - health - by WTF, America? (man) - Sweden

Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML

#20818899
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55251) - you deserved it (8260)

On 08/03/2013 at 4:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Portugal

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

#20818422
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60254) - you deserved it (5930)

On 08/03/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by zackeryburch - United States (California)

Today, I was trying to be sexy in the bathtub for my boyfriend. I leaned back and caught my hair on fire with the candle. FML

#20818297
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43550) - you deserved it (14466)

On 08/03/2013 at 4:40am - love - by Msmerfner - United States (California)

Today, I found a topless photo of my mother on my phone. Thanks, iCloud. FML

#20818189
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47732) - you deserved it (4570)

On 08/03/2013 at 2:46am - misc - by fsdjhgasjlhg (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while taking a walk in the forest, someone approached me and asked to borrow the knife I had clipped to my pocket. I happily obliged, assuming he just needed it as a tool. Instead, he used the knife to mug me, taking my cellphone and my wallet. I was robbed with my own knife. FML

Today, I found out that when I text my boyfriend, he isn't the one to read them. Instead, he pays his friend to "keep the bitch busy." FML

#20813368
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59757) - you deserved it (6342)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:49pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went out and met somebody. We got talking and we both realized we are each the ideal romantic partner for the other. The only problem is we are both straight men. FML

#20809215
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49967) - you deserved it (7411)

On 07/29/2013 at 2:35am - love - by confusedmofo - Indonesia

Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML

#20808604
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59241) - you deserved it (8822)

On 07/28/2013 at 8:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40008) - you deserved it (27075)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about how I'm jealous of her best guy friend always hanging around her. She responded by saying, "Wait, I thought you knew I was dating him too?" FML

Today, I attended an elderly patient's funeral. He died of a heart attack after his daughter, as his carer, stopped all of his meds in favour of a half-cup of garlic a day. Apparently she'd "read an article" about the healing power of garlic, which trumped my 6-year degree. FML

#20804217
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48067) - you deserved it (2558)

On 07/26/2013 at 3:58am - health - by Saddoc (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was having dinner at a long-time friend's place. In a matter of 15 minutes, her mom had managed to establish unequivocally that three kinds of people were ruining the world: vegetarians, atheists and homosexuals. I'm all three rolled into one. She knows that. FML

#20804013
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44513) - you deserved it (14706)

On 07/26/2013 at 1:31am - misc - by WhyThankYou (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, a drunk dude walked up to me and said, "You're ugly as fuck." His sober friend quickly apologized and explained that he was wasted, before looking me up and down and adding "Well, not completely, I guess." FML

#20801990
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45989) - you deserved it (3485)

On 07/24/2013 at 10:33pm - misc - by GeeThanks (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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