Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

helen_ellexo

Online | Search for a member

helen_ellexo

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1437
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About helen_ellexo : Wooo!

helen_ellexo's page activity

Visits<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:31am<b>decimater</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 3:36pm<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 3:16am<b>GarrettP28</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 12:41am<b>kingzxcreed</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 8:07am<b>andyhitts25</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 9:52pm<b>Rizzen</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 8:50pm<b>Gb1625</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 9:04pm<b>monkeycrutch</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 12:49am<b>sammybone96</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 11:01pm<b>melinal</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 9:03pm<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 7:03pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 6:26am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 11:36am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 6:14am<b>mein_blut69</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 12:49pm<b>OochenSnoochen</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 12:10pm<b>bellenblaasbaas</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 5:15pm

helen_ellexo's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of helen_ellexo's badges

helen_ellexo's favorite FMLs

Today, my 15-year-old son begged me to pre-order the next season of My Little Pony. FML

#20002664
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21527) - you deserved it (6370)

On 08/04/2012 at 7:04pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my 2-year-old son to the ear doctor, since he'd stopped responding whenever I call him. The doctor told me that his ears are just fine. He's just ignoring me. FML

#19990524
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22812) - you deserved it (5051)

On 07/29/2012 at 8:20am - kids - by fml - Japan (Saitama)

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

#19810073
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42806) - you deserved it (3916)

On 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML

#19801481
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10504) - you deserved it (23041)

On 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm - misc - by kitty shah - United States

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

#19710160
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10129) - you deserved it (29557)

On 05/31/2012 at 3:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10479) - you deserved it (40586)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, my wife and I decided to try role-playing. I started cleaning the pool. waiting for her to come out and be sexy, but she never did. I'd cleaned the entire pool before going into the house to ask why she never came out. She said she tricked me into cleaning the pool. FML

#19455819
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28996) - you deserved it (19195)

On 04/12/2012 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by CantPublish - United States (California)

Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML

#19305380
7 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18216) - you deserved it (12703)

On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML

#19293533
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33899) - you deserved it (9318)

On 03/17/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by noneedtostress - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mother caught me masturbating. Trying to defuse the awkward tension, I said "Oh, I was just thinking about you!" Not a good idea. FML

#19239456
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14377) - you deserved it (49900)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:03pm - intimacy - by Fraser - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found the list my wife made of the things she was going to give up for Lent. The first one was "Sex with other men". FML

#19159712
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39260) - you deserved it (3001)

On 02/25/2012 at 9:35am - intimacy - by fmylifebigtime - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

#19064063
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32034) - you deserved it (6164)

On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML

#19059708
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27779) - you deserved it (2104)

On 02/12/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I moved around a little, so my date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassed, giving me a reassuring look. FML

#18753577
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30583) - you deserved it (5781)

On 01/09/2012 at 1:14am - love - by Whyme (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I accidentally moaned my own name during sex. FML

#18703291
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31643) - you deserved it (27370)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: