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helen_ellexo

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helen_ellexo

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1695
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About helen_ellexo : Wooo!

helen_ellexo's page activity

Visits<b>Rizzen</b> - 14 hours ago<b>kingzxcreed</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 2:26am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:31am<b>decimater</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 3:36pm<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 3:16am<b>GarrettP28</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 12:41am<b>andyhitts25</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 9:52pm<b>Gb1625</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 9:04pm<b>monkeycrutch</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 12:49am<b>sammybone96</b> - the 12/22/2013 at 11:01pm<b>melinal</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 9:03pm<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 7:03pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 6:26am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 11:36am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 6:14am<b>mein_blut69</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 12:49pm<b>OochenSnoochen</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 12:10pm<b>bellenblaasbaas</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 5:15pm

Liked!<b>kingzxcreed</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 8:26am

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helen_ellexo's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

#21217633
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21243) - you deserved it (49875)

On 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm - health - by dypshyyt - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw a pair of eyes looking at me from my closet. Realizing it must be my cat, I called her. She immediately came out from under my bed. I can't find anything in my closet. FML

#21155508
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59048) - you deserved it (4562)

On 05/29/2014 at 2:46am - animals - by Idk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally had a date, my first one in well over a year. Everything was going good, until my date asked, "Do you like cats or dogs better?" When I responded cats, my date promptly got up and left, saying, "This isn't meant to be." FML

#21147101
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47731) - you deserved it (11699)

On 05/21/2014 at 7:05am - love - by Alone - United States (Michigan)

Today, I nervously flirted with a very cute guy. Being a little overweight, I rarely think cute guys will go for me. This line of thinking was yet again correct when he casually pulled his sleeve up revealing a tattoo of a pinup girl with a "NO FAT CHICKS" sign below it. FML

#21138042
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55761) - you deserved it (7131)

On 05/12/2014 at 7:49pm - love - by nofatchicks (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, three different strangers stopped me on the street and asked if I was Brad Pitt. Either there's some kind of conspiracy going on, or I'm the world's ugliest woman. FML

#21137630
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51183) - you deserved it (5030)

On 05/12/2014 at 10:38am - misc - by Lookalike (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

#21137389
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58853) - you deserved it (5038)

On 05/12/2014 at 1:17am - kids - by kids -

Today, my dad made me stick my gut out and walk around awkwardly, just so I'd look pregnant and let him get away with parking in an "expectant mothers" parking spot. FML

#21118067
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39083) - you deserved it (4398)

On 04/20/2014 at 1:21pm - misc - by Not-pregnant (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was babysitting a 9-year-old kid, when she got thirsty and asked for a drink. All I could find was some kind of Mexican fruit drink, but I didn't realize until too late that it was actually hard liquor. I had to scrub her mouth out with toothpaste and put her to bed to cover it all up. FML

#21116530
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25391) - you deserved it (43053)

On 04/18/2014 at 5:31pm - kids - by cantprovenothing (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52027) - you deserved it (4704)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, my Game of Thrones addicted girlfriend decided to name my penis Tyrion Lannister. FML

#21101155
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41454) - you deserved it (6808)

On 03/31/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by off to the whorehouse, then (man) - United Kingdom (Brighton and Hove)

Today, while I thought I'd never had an orgasm, my doctor informed me that I'm actually having orgasms almost every time I have sex. They just feel like utterly frustrating, slightly painful, unpleasurable and completely unsatisfying muscle contractions. FML

Today, I had to explain to my neighbours that I wasn't "watching porn" earlier, and that I was honestly just watching an episode of Game of Thrones. FML

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46175) - you deserved it (6773)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I went to a party organised by my ex. I was the last to sit down, after looking at the nametags on all 50+ chairs. That's how I realised the chair labelled "Fuckface" was mine; the one located between her parents' seats. FML

#21006556
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37765) - you deserved it (8951) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/26/2013 at 6:50pm - misc - by Puick (man) - France (Centre)

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53068) - you deserved it (2930)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)



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