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heitone

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heitone

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2718
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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heitone's page activity

Visits<b>Trollz4daLULZ</b> - the 08/10/2010 at 4:52pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 02/07/2010 at 10:18pm<b>CASSIDIZZLE95</b> - the 01/22/2010 at 2:56am<b>soccerchic64life</b> - the 07/15/2009 at 9:34pm

heitone's FML badges

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heitone's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in McDonalds with some friends. When I got up to the register to order, the guy there appeared startled by me, and said, 'Whoa, you're really pretty.' No one has ever said anything like that to me before. When I told my friends, they laughed and said, 'Wow. He must have been drunk.' FML

#13836809
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29708) - you deserved it (3041)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:39am - misc - by ugly (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my teacher turned around from the blackboard and screamed, "Stop chewing your gum like a cow!" That wasn't so bad.--The bad part was when she realized it was me, she apologized saying, " I am sorry. You are not really a cow. I don't want to traumatize you; you're just overweight." FML

#13836684
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33160) - you deserved it (7376)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:31am - misc - by teach (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me I was the only girl he'd ever text, call, or flirt with again. Later on he told two other girls exactly the same thing on Facebook, not realizing that everybody can read wall messages. FML

#13829290
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29346) - you deserved it (3226)

On 11/13/2010 at 4:45pm - love - by girlwithaprob (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a girl who has had a problem with me for as long as I can remember, tagged me in a Facebook status update in which she equated my intelligence to that of a mollusk and equated my weight to that of a hippopotamus. My boyfriend, as well as several of my "friends," liked it. FML

#13789800
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27459) - you deserved it (3984)

On 11/10/2010 at 12:33pm - misc - by smarter than a mollusk, skinner than a hippo - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. He got on the bed on all fours and crawled towards me, saying "My precious... my precious" in Gollum's voice. FML

#13782516
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38231) - you deserved it (6916)

On 11/09/2010 at 9:10pm - intimacy - by single (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met my boyfriend's whole family. Between them they had about 10 teeth. FML

#13770099
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32233) - you deserved it (4562)

On 11/08/2010 at 9:25pm - love - by unknown - United States (Florida)

Today, my manager informed me that I will not be completing my job training because I'll be transferring to a different store, and if they want me to work there, that's their problem. Today, I also found out that the new store will not accept me as a transfer unless I've already been trained. FML

#13753819
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21835) - you deserved it (1991)

On 11/07/2010 at 3:34pm - work - by Problem - United States (California)

Today, my sixteen year old son told me that he's following his guidance counselor's advice: to do what his hero does for a living. The problem? His hero is SpongeBob Squarepants. His ambition in life is to become a fry cook. FML

#13753652
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24901) - you deserved it (4055)

On 11/07/2010 at 3:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, after moving house, changing my number, my email, and beginning legal action to get away from a girl who was stalking me, I decided to go to the movies to relax. As soon as I got in my seat, that same girl walked into the nearly empty theatre. She sat next to me. FML

#13723810
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35619) - you deserved it (2688)

On 11/05/2010 at 5:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was eating lunch at McDonald's when an older man sat down at the table next to me and told me I was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen. I'm a 20 year old man. FML

#13715432
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30288) - you deserved it (5291)

On 11/04/2010 at 3:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, waking up I noticed that my female boss had texted me during the night, telling me she wants me bad. I'm a woman, happily married to a man, and now have to turn her down somehow and not get fired in the process. FML

#13700074
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32278) - you deserved it (2903)

On 11/03/2010 at 10:35am - intimacy - by tuppu (woman) - Finland

Today, our class was focusing on discrimination, and our teacher asked us if anyone had ever felt discriminated against. I put my hand up to share a story, and my teacher immediately said "It's because you're ginger, isn't it?" That's not what I was going to say. FML

#13688243
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39075) - you deserved it (6990)

On 11/02/2010 at 1:43pm - misc - by gingerninja (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was the first time in four months since our baby was born, that I could really enjoy it. After we finished up we walked into the livingroom, where my white faced brother was sitting. He said we left the baby monitor on. FML

#13687643
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12632) - you deserved it (32284)

On 11/02/2010 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I moved back in with my parents in order to help them with the mortgage, so they don't lose the house that has been in our family for three generations. I also found out that I now have a curfew, and so does my husband and our 3 year old son. FML

#13685830
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32709) - you deserved it (4498)

On 11/02/2010 at 8:17am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was cashier at work. The line came to a stop, but there was still people there. I kept saying next, but no one moved. I finally looked over the counter where there was a lady who had been standing there the whole time. She was a midget. FML

#13684047
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34759) - you deserved it (12641)

On 11/02/2010 at 2:20am - work - by saraleerocha - Sent from mobile version



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