Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

heirofhope

Online | Search for a member

heirofhope

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 512
  • Number of comments : 142
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

heirofhope's page activity

Visits<b>killer0689</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 11:07pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 4:24pm<b>abs94</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 10:41am<b>Micool</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 4:24pm<b>subscript</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 7:25am<b>JayGatsby</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 10:47pm<b>tyler_tite</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 9:13pm<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 8:30pm<b>irisr</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 4:40pm<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 2:39pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 1:43pm<b>zobara</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 6:44am<b>TM24D</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 10:29pm<b>dkaplan930</b> - the 05/04/2015 at 5:54pm<b>hokiegirl4074</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 8:45am<b>1997_Life</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 11:20pm<b>XxDanno316xX</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 10:35pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 10:19pm

Fucked!<b>JayGatsby</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 4:47am<b>tyler_tite</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 3:13am<b>firefighterwife</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 8:39pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 7:43pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 4:19am<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 4:24am<b>JarodWalrus</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 5:23am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 4:02pm

heirofhope's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of heirofhope's badges

heirofhope's favorite FMLs

Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to see me and told me that he had a surprise for me. I was excited at the idea of a romantic gesture, but forgot about it until he arrived and things began heating up. As I was removing his pants, I said, "Ooh, you shaved!" to which he replied, "Surprise!" FML

#21435204
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22151) - you deserved it (3384)

On 07/02/2015 at 1:53am - intimacy - by mirandale (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I'm warning you: never spoon naked with your girlfriend after eating taco bell. The shartpocalypse just might begin in her ass and end on your stomach. FML

#21420039
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29432) - you deserved it (3953)

On 06/03/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

#21403147
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32865) - you deserved it (3412)

On 05/01/2015 at 10:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML

Today, I was staying at my boyfriend's house while he was at work, and put on his pants to make some tea. As I took my hot tea and laptop upstairs, the pants slowly started to fall down. I had to keep climbing with my pants around my knees, and shuffle awkwardly past my boyfriend's father. FML

#21399154
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25070) - you deserved it (7711)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:38pm - misc - by Bullet4MyChemaMo - Ireland (Cork)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend dumped me. Not for cheating or for flirting, but because I wear tighty whities. FML

#21376186
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28984) - you deserved it (18670)

On 03/17/2015 at 3:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

#21365242
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18782) - you deserved it (55560)

On 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out my girlfriend is bulimic. Like that wasn't bad enough, I found out because she spent all of our rent money on food. FML

#21345004
113 comments

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

#21312768
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41575) - you deserved it (2599)

On 12/06/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my taxi driver kept falling asleep and swerving off the road, so I asked him if he was okay. He stopped and burst out sobbing about the long hours he had to do after his divorce and his wife taking all he had. Long story short, I ended up driving him home and getting a taxi from his place. FML

#21273346
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39779) - you deserved it (3408)

On 10/08/2014 at 5:01am - misc - by rockytrolley - Cyprus

Today, while on vacation, my parents called to inform me that my best friend had died in a car accident. Why? To trick me into tearfully confessing my love for him. It worked. FML

#21272324
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50794) - you deserved it (4532)

On 10/06/2014 at 9:14pm - love - by whywouldyoudothat - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65702) - you deserved it (16603)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

#1815413
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77846) - you deserved it (8617)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by airport (woman) - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: