Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

headofmedusa

Online | Search for a member

headofmedusa

12Liked!

headofmedusaheadofmedusa
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 409
  • Number of comments : 98
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About headofmedusa : I love metal and tea. Oh, and my name is Jackie.

headofmedusa's page activity

Visits<b>briang959</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 4:48pm<b>arrowmaker</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 8:11am<b>kittyfrozen</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 5:16pm<b>wantmeasandwich</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 12:26pm<b>ThatRunner</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 12:50pm<b>njgohard</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 7:52am<b>PrimeEvilTahir</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 10:54pm<b>Allornone</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 9:39pm<b>mansfield_j</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 9:06pm<b>wiensw</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 8:04pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 7:13pm<b>emily1015</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:33pm<b>AllKnowingTurtle</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:01pm<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:22pm<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 12:12pm<b>luckyme143</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 12:02pm<b>mif</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 8:24pm<b>LebanonBaby</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 8:04pm

Liked!<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 12:12pm<b>madisonliz</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 4:35am<b>Wingman527</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:57pm<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 12:42am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 3:50am<b>Ironmayhem</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:47am<b>EmpireCityRay</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 11:07am<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 7:43am<b>robertd73</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 6:00am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 4:11pm<b>FrankHotpants</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 11:47pm<b>chicken_noodle</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 6:43pm

headofmedusa's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of headofmedusa's badges

headofmedusa's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML

#21304373
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24832) - you deserved it (2227)

On 11/23/2014 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend broke the bed pretending to be a caterpillar. FML

#21300031
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26526) - you deserved it (2934)

On 11/16/2014 at 4:44am - love - by tine - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

#21299949
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34001) - you deserved it (3391)

On 11/16/2014 at 12:29am - kids - by wtfdad - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I excitedly told my mom that I'm pregnant with my second child. She shot back, "You know what's a REAL achievement? Jacking your dad off in church last week without anyone noticing. Aim higher." I really didn't need to know that. FML

#21294899
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39616) - you deserved it (3409)

On 11/08/2014 at 6:02pm - kids - by jennabee97 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36310) - you deserved it (10571)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I was the weird girl on the city bus who falls asleep then makes a loud, weird noise and wakes herself up. FML

#21284017
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29159) - you deserved it (3917)

On 10/23/2014 at 9:05pm - misc - by pyrogypsy (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML

#21281977
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29918) - you deserved it (4751)

On 10/20/2014 at 8:38pm - misc - by Anonymos_fmler - United States (Illinois)

Today, I gave birth to my first child. The first thing my husband says? "When can I hit it again, doc?" FML

#21280942
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34521) - you deserved it (4310)

On 10/19/2014 at 7:22am - kids - by how about never? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

#21280696
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35727) - you deserved it (3575)

On 10/18/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML

#21279992
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28922) - you deserved it (3068)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:30pm - kids - by KayyElOh94 - United States

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

#21279204
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34454) - you deserved it (3448)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I finally worked up the nerve to talk dirty to my boyfriend, after he promised not to laugh at me. All seemed well, until I heard laughter. It wasn't him, though; it was his family listening from the other room. FML

#21275034
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37922) - you deserved it (5739)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:33pm - intimacy - by TalkDirtyToMe - New Zealand

Today, my boyfriend tried to be dominant during sex. It was so out of character for him, I couldn't help but break into hysterical laughter. FML

#21266104
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36220) - you deserved it (9368)

On 09/26/2014 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand

Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up. He greeted me with a winning smile, a belch, and the words, "Nice tits." I'm beginning to lose hope. FML

#21265612
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34318) - you deserved it (3221)

On 09/26/2014 at 2:56am - love - by bri_sci94 - United States (Wisconsin)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: