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headofchairclub

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headofchairclub
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 49
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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headofchairclub's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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headofchairclub's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a black eye while trying to break up a fight caused by some complete bastard making a "yo momma" joke at the funeral of my best friend's mother. FML

#21042087
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51218) - you deserved it (3940)

On 01/27/2014 at 6:09pm - health - by knobbed (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, as I was driving back home from my grandma's, I looked over at the guy in the lane beside me, only to witness him with a sandwich between his teeth and his cock in his free hand. Now I know why I don't leave the city, or even drive, more often. FML

#21006441
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33567) - you deserved it (3065)

On 12/26/2013 at 6:21pm - intimacy - by NNTA (woman) - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, I watched as my grandma beat the shit out of my dad at the zoo. FML

#20948659
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42747) - you deserved it (3613)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by Grandson - United States (California)

Today, for the tenth time, my teacher made a misbehaving student sit next to me as punishment. He begged for detention instead. FML

#20945365
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46257) - you deserved it (5077)

On 11/04/2013 at 5:01pm - misc - by WinkleBottom (man) - United States

Today, I heard my surgeon mutter to a nurse how easy it would be to kill me on the operating table and make it look like an accident. FML

#20940427
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44194) - you deserved it (2710)

On 10/31/2013 at 4:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realized it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML

#20929016
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48324) - you deserved it (3347)

On 10/21/2013 at 3:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, as I was enjoying a nice fish salad, my father looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Ahh, salmon. The 'other' pink meat", then winked suggestively at my mother. I don't think I can ever eat fish again. FML

#20763590
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55529) - you deserved it (4333)

On 07/04/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by ugh (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, my daughter's obsession with Canada got out way of hand when she was suspended for climbing up the flagpole, in an attempt to replace the flag with a red-and-white maple leaf one. FML

Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML

#20540752
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32159) - you deserved it (4890)

On 03/12/2013 at 12:43pm - misc - by ShadowBox (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

#20536627
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35870) - you deserved it (2748)

On 03/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

#20451560
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28697) - you deserved it (8469)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia

Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML

#20434488
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34539) - you deserved it (3089)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by _The__Doctor_ (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while I was taking my driver's test, my instructor received a text message. He promptly had a panic attack and screamed for me to pull over. It turned out his wife wanted a divorce. The last 15 minutes of my test consisted of him sobbing to himself as I drove back to the DMV. FML

#20024961
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22718) - you deserved it (1415)

On 08/16/2012 at 6:36pm - misc - by Samantha (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35071) - you deserved it (3815)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a restaurant in front of a lot of people. Once I said yes, some guy yelled out, "SEX. SEX. SEX." My boyfriend yelled back, "LATER!" FML

#19734660
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24664) - you deserved it (5489)

On 06/04/2012 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by BooBabe (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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