haze420

Search for a member

haze420

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 25 June 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 903
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About haze420 : what it is love.
peace.

haze420's page activity

Visits<b>LPac5295</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 1:26am<b>Ayezed</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 4:26pm<b>Robert27</b> - the 07/15/2010 at 4:25am<b>Masta_Blasta</b> - the 06/25/2009 at 4:54am<b>Nick86</b> - the 06/22/2009 at 10:44am<b>maddog</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 12:07pm<b>Ilovelife07</b> - the 06/13/2009 at 5:31pm<b>monsooneth</b> - the 06/04/2009 at 7:29pm<b>xabuko</b> - the 06/04/2009 at 2:09am<b>Tehalon</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 6:01pm<b>noshitsherlock</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 5:43pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 06/03/2009 at 2:36am<b>Chaith</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 2:17pm

haze420's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

haze420's favorite FMLs

Today, I was smoking in my car and flicked the butt... into the face of a cop on a motorcycle going the other way. FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2009 at 12:09am / United States (Oregon) / Transportation

Today, I woke up feeling like shit after I had spent the whole night taking care of my sick boyfriend. He got up early, feeling great, bouncing around the house. When I finally got up I told him I didn't feel well and he yelled at me for being a bitch in the morning that slows him down. FML

by adderallgirl / 06/12/2009 at 4:04pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

by quadropheniac / 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered an enormous hairy spider sitting in the bathtub. I also discovered that I scream like a girl and pee a little bit when I am truly terrified. FML

by imfromtexas02 / 06/06/2009 at 10:03am / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I was on a roller coaster and this 13 year old sitting next to me was completely terrified. To cheer him up, I threw my hands in the air. While my hands were up, we hit a curve and I elbowed him in the face, making him cry. FML

by rollerSWEETness / 06/03/2009 at 11:16am / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I was taken a taxi home after drinking too much. I started to feel sick and, not wanting to be charged the cab cleaning fee, threw up into my handbag instead. When we got to my place I then had to fish through that bag for my wallet to pay the driver. FML

by Unimpressed / 06/03/2009 at 6:40am / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Transportation

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

by Higgs / 06/02/2009 at 3:10pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I returned to my apartment to find everything reduced to ashes, hidden in black clouds of smoke. Turns out there was a blackout, and my fiancé lit a candle on top of a stack of all our wedding papers. When he smelled the smoke, he got hungry for a taco and left instead of calling 911. FML

by Jeanine / 05/28/2009 at 9:32pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML

by madzlovesgee / 05/16/2009 at 1:44pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

by Dunzo15 / 05/02/2009 at 2:28am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I was walking downstairs to the subway. At the top of the stairs this hobo was peeing. Two seconds before, I told my friend I felt rain. It wasn't rain. FML

by DudeManBro69 / 05/01/2009 at 9:15am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML

by brad3720 / 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I gave myself a facial with one of those masks you leave on for a while. I busied myself by tidying my room while it dried and eventually forgot all about it. I finally remembered about it after I answered the door to the postman. Not embarassing enough? I'm a guy. FML

by skc / 03/14/2009 at 7:36am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in the change room at the local YMCA. I went to use the hair dryer but couldn't because a naked old man was bent over, butt cheeks spread wide with his hands, and ass aimed at the dryer. He seemed to be enjoying it. FML

by nuberific / 03/05/2009 at 1:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized the annoying squealing I hear every night isn't my guinea pig. Apparently my brothers girlfriend makes that sound when they have sex. FML

by KTK / 02/17/2009 at 8:00pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy