Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hazard_havoc17

Offline (the 03/23/2014 at 3:20am) | Search for a member

hazard_havoc17

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 926
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About hazard_havoc17 : it's a bio what do you expect me to fuckin' put here?

hazard_havoc17's page activity

Visits<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 2:19pm<b>JohniF</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 9:20pm<b>scooter2011</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 9:39pm<b>german_boy97</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 1:01pm<b>Cherrylimes</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 1:18pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 12:46pm<b>Breezeblocks_</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 7:32pm<b>RainbowDashie140</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 12:17pm<b>xzeldax3</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 6:35am<b>messorix</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 2:44am<b>chargers2588</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 12:33pm<b>Oddyesy</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 3:13pm<b>olpally</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 5:09pm<b>ohaidereitszeex3</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:22am<b>edris_305</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:18am<b>hawright</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:34pm<b>isallwaysme</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:05pm<b>Fmlano</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 11:26am

hazard_havoc17's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of hazard_havoc17's badges

hazard_havoc17's favorite FMLs

Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML

#19526031
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21742) - you deserved it (2679)

On 04/25/2012 at 2:46am - work - by foshizzle (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up with a splitting headache. I have no idea what happened the night before, except for the fact that I'd tucked two uncapped vodka bottles into bed beside me, and now my room reeks of a Russian sorority house. FML

#19417580
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5658) - you deserved it (21632)

On 04/06/2012 at 12:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, while talking to my girlfriend, the subject of Darth Vader came up. That's when she asked me, "Aren't Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker the same person?" I don't know what's worse, the fact that she asked me that, or the fact that I got upset over her lack of Star Wars knowledge. FML

#19411033
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20283) - you deserved it (11741)

On 04/05/2012 at 7:29am - misc - by Nadaz (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39383) - you deserved it (12183)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML

#19189124
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34989) - you deserved it (2434)

On 02/29/2012 at 2:18pm - misc - by ouch (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML

#19023656
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32771) - you deserved it (4116)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:17am - love - by daughterofanazi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was making breakfast. My microwave door was already open, but I couldn't figure that out so I kept pressing the button. According to Einstein, I'm now insane. FML

#18906599
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7255) - you deserved it (25845)

On 01/25/2012 at 10:54am - health - by lol - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML

#18784375
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13851) - you deserved it (23984)

On 01/12/2012 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Armagh)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I have never read any of the Harry Potter books. FML

#18781684
527 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30022) - you deserved it (53411)

On 01/12/2012 at 12:36am - love - by Nate (man) - United States

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

#18754752
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30816) - you deserved it (2305)

On 01/09/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by maruskasommers (woman) - Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj)

Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML

#18547021
476 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18784) - you deserved it (15867)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:48pm - misc - by fmT719 - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48496) - you deserved it (7722)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend shoved a Q-tip up my ass while I was brushing my teeth. FML

#18449583
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35154) - you deserved it (6625)

On 12/06/2011 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by Surprisebuttsecks? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after I went to collect my pay for babysitting, the girl's dad pulled the old "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" bull on me. Hoping to show that I wasn't going to play ball, I told him that watching his gran inhale a cock would be funnier. If scowls could kill... FML

#18350847
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7463) - you deserved it (58153)

On 11/25/2011 at 9:09pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was involved in a car accident and hit my head on the dash. I now have huge, very sore knot on my head. My boyfriend now takes every opportunity to poke it and scream "Look! A baby unicorn!" FML

#18280377
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29016) - you deserved it (3746)

On 11/18/2011 at 10:26am - misc - by southernpride93 - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: