About hazard_havoc17 : it's a bio what do you expect me to fuckin' put here?
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hazard_havoc17's favorite FMLs
Today, I entered my bedroom, ready to play some COD on my xbox 360. Instead, I find a note where my xbox used to be. It read "You think you can cheat on me and get away with it? Fuck you. I smashed the hell out of your stupid xbox." It was signed by my girlfriend. I never cheated on her. FML
by Anonymous / 01/06/2010 at 7:29pm / Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador) / Miscellaneous
by ambermcnulty / 01/04/2010 at 9:27pm / Intimacy
Today, I heard my cat climbing on the counters in the kitchen. To prevent a tremendous avalanche of dishes, I picked up the cat and put it outside. She got scared from the blinds and scurried away leaving deep scratches across my nipple. I wasn't wearing a shirt. FML
by ihatecats / 12/01/2009 at 2:05am / United States / Health
Today, after reading a very emotional article about always letting your loved ones know how much you love them in case it's your last time seeing them, I went to my mom and told her how much I loved her and how thankful I was for everything. Her reply? "Shut up kid, Vince Vaughn is on Ellen". FML
by ilovemom / 12/01/2009 at 1:20am / Costa Rica (Heredia) / Miscellaneous
by Thanks / 11/27/2009 at 6:36pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous
by Fmyoffice / 11/27/2009 at 2:51pm / United Kingdom (Lincolnshire) / Work
by Rejected. / 11/22/2009 at 12:49pm / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love
Today, I drove from Seattle, WA to Vancouver, BC for the Three Days Grace concert. I was so excited when I found the building. There was a big readerboard that flashed "THREE DAYS GRACE" and I cheered. Then it flashed "CANCELLED." FML
by illinformed / 11/18/2009 at 12:23am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, in class, everyone read my Creative Writing submission. It was a touching story about the unconditional love that exists between dog and his owner. Everybody unanimously agreed that it was probably about bestiality. FML
by Quirk / 10/29/2009 at 1:17am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I was tinting my own eyelashes when I missed my eyelashes and stabbed myself in the eye with the applicator loaded with dye. Now, I have beautiful lush black eyelashes, to match my half closed swollen red left eye. Sexy. FML
by Bunni / 10/22/2009 at 6:22pm / Australia (Queensland) / Health
by holy / 10/21/2009 at 5:03pm / United Kingdom (London) / Kids
by cbarebo / 10/11/2009 at 1:21pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, the guy I'd been talking to online and liked came to my house party with a bunch of mutual friends. He spent the night sitting in the corner on the sofa talking to my cat. I woke up later to see that not only had he crashed for the night, but he'd curled up in the dog basket. FML
by Anonymous / 10/09/2009 at 2:48pm / United Kingdom (Greater London) / Animals
Today, I was chewing my pen while I was paying attention to my teacher. I chewed a bit too hard, and something broke off, so I casually looked at my pen. It was unharmed. One of my front teeth had broken off. Everyone in class, including the teacher, had to see it before I could call my dentist. FML
by Nochnoii / 10/07/2009 at 4:07pm / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Health
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got… 3Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for…