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Offline (the 03/23/2014 at 3:20am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4127
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About hazard_havoc17 : it's a bio what do you expect me to fuckin' put here?

hazard_havoc17's page activity

Visits<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 2:19pm<b>JohniF</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 9:20pm<b>scooter2011</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 9:39pm<b>german_boy97</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 1:01pm<b>Cherrylimes</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 1:18pm<b>DeidaraAkatsuki</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 12:46pm<b>Breezeblocks_</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 7:32pm<b>RainbowDashie140</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 12:17pm<b>xzeldax3</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 6:35am<b>messorix</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 2:44am<b>chargers2588</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 12:33pm<b>Oddyesy</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 3:13pm<b>olpally</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 5:09pm<b>ohaidereitszeex3</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:22am<b>edris_305</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 8:18am<b>hawright</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:34pm<b>isallwaysme</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:05pm<b>Fmlano</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 11:26am

hazard_havoc17's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of hazard_havoc17's badges

hazard_havoc17's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 8:28pm / United States (Nevada) / Love

Today, I woke up after a dream where I got it good from none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger. The problem? I'm a guy, and straight. Apparently my subconscious has a fetish for old Austrian bodybuilders. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 6:23am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Intimacy

Today, my wife and I had one of the biggest arguments we've ever had, which resulted in her leaving, going to her parents' house and calling me twice, screaming and sobbing. The argument was over a seven dollar bottle of wine. Apparently, she was "saving it for a special occasion." FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2010 at 9:02pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML

by youreajoker / 11/10/2010 at 5:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I learned that everyone at college was calling me "Parallel Lines" because I've got an unibrow and an apparent hairiness over my mouth. By the way, I'm a girl. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2010 at 1:16pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

by Anonymous / 10/09/2010 at 1:15am / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Intimacy

Today, it was the first day of astronomy class and we all waited for the professor to enter the classroom. All of a sudden, someone turns the lights off, it's pitch black, and we hear the professor saying, "Greetings earthlings..." It's going to be a long semester. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2010 at 2:04am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, while eating lunch, one of my friends told a joke that made everyone at the table laugh. Apparently, the guy standing behind me overheard and was laughing too. So much in fact that he spewed the red Gatorade he was drinking all over the back of my white shirt and hair. FML

by gatorhead / 09/09/2010 at 2:05pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my very handsome, fit, Russian boyfriend tried to make me feel better about being a little overweight by telling me, "It's okay, you're American, everyone expects you to be fat." FML

by ChubbyAmerican / 05/22/2010 at 7:24pm / United States (New Mexico) / Love

Today, my very handsome, fit, Russian boyfriend tried to make me feel better about being a little overweight by telling me, "It's okay, you're American, everyone expects you to be fat." FML

by ChubbyAmerican / 05/22/2010 at 7:24pm / United States (New Mexico) / Love

Today, I found out exactly what Ducolax stool softener is all about. Holy colon cleanse Batman! FML

by Username / 03/03/2010 at 11:34am / Health

Today, I drunkenly hooked up with my friend's cousin. After trying to stick his finger up my butt, he blacked out on top of me with his penis still hard inside me. I tried yelling his name and pushing him off, with no success. I ended up having to call my friend to help me. FML

by lendahandmanda / 02/23/2010 at 7:01pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got a reply to my Valentine's Day card that I sent to my girlfriend. I'll get the address right next time because her neighbor is really creeping me out now. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 3:25am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I have the flu, food poisoning and I'm on my period. I have enough liquids pouring out of me from various holes to satisfy a sewer. FML

by SickSmick / 02/09/2010 at 7:22am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Health

Today, my dad thought it'd be funny to put an Edward Cullen cutout behind my car as I backed it out the garage to see my reaction. Oh it was funny alright, except I was so scared that when I saw him through the mirror I reacted by stepping on the gas. We now have half a garage door. FML

by garage / 01/27/2010 at 1:21am / Miscellaneous