Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

haylburg

Offline (10 hours ago) | Search for a member

haylburg

258Fucked!

haylburghaylburg
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 9260
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About haylburg : 🔒19/6/15🔒

haylburg's page activity

Visits<b>Cristian89</b> - 4 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - 8 hours ago<b>bigdog80</b> - 9 hours ago<b>CyberSeeker</b> - 9 hours ago<b>americanafrican</b> - 9 hours ago<b>worldclassrager</b> - 14 hours ago<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - 16 hours ago<b>Sklinetobe88</b> - 20 hours ago<b>FMLUSER12345612</b> - 23 hours ago<b>sammy011</b> - yesterday at 12:46am<b>kitkat818</b> - yesterday at 12:30am<b>BakenWake420</b> - yesterday at 7:05pm<b>cristinewest</b> - yesterday at 6:16pm<b>khoov19</b> - yesterday at 5:48pm<b>the_aspect</b> - yesterday at 5:24pm<b>Shayn_25</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 2:12am<b>ManUtdforlife</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 1:51am<b>Lct1196</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 12:46am

Fucked!<b>cristinewest</b> - yesterday at 12:16am<b>Melanie_marii</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 10:17am<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 6:34am<b>CyberSeeker</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 12:23am<b>BigBen86</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 3:37pm<b>Larry01</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 10:22pm<b>afrostybird</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 4:51pm<b>badcompanycali</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 5:28am<b>Motocrosskid87</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 3:55am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 4:21am<b>Shuff52</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 7:15pm<b>NephilimPie</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 7:04am<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:35am<b>razoray9</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 4:06pm<b>Smurphy121</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:58pm<b>antart3</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 12:42pm<b>dirtbikeguy</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 6:10am<b>santosdecaprio</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 11:29pm

haylburg's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

See all of haylburg's badges

haylburg's favorite FMLs

Today, in a desperate attempt to get fired, I sent a sexual love letter to my boss. We're going on our first date tomorrow. FML

#21350765
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20805) - you deserved it (37730)

On 02/06/2015 at 3:06am - work - by fucked - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend announced to me he was sleeping with another girl via alphabet soup. FML

#20968871
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46979) - you deserved it (3648)

On 11/24/2013 at 11:01am - love - by fries - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that no matter what I accomplish in life, I'll always be remembered for being the son of a woman so stupid that she claimed she used to be Elvis Presley's mistress. She was still an infant when he died. FML

#20968220
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43507) - you deserved it (2932)

On 11/23/2013 at 6:45pm - misc - by fs (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62379) - you deserved it (4530)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML

Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML

#20967242
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46131) - you deserved it (4677)

On 11/22/2013 at 8:08pm - love - by quit fucking up my life (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my boyfriend got on one knee and started talking about how we met. Knowing what was coming, I started tearing up, absolutely sure he was going to propose. Just as I was about to say yes, he quickly stood up and yelled "HAH, JUST KIDDING". FML

#20967193
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60153) - you deserved it (5561)

On 11/22/2013 at 7:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

#20961988
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46531) - you deserved it (18615)

On 11/18/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by flavored (woman) - United States

Today, I found myself admiring my eyelids for being the only parts of my face not covered in acne. FML

#20960938
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43671) - you deserved it (4068)

On 11/17/2013 at 2:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, one of the special needs teens I work with confessed his love for me. It was cute until he put his erection on my leg and attempted to hump me. FML

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45305) - you deserved it (3037)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

#20952990
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43802) - you deserved it (3994)

On 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was quizzing a girl at my college, and I noticed that when she answered a question, her ears wiggled. It was cute, so I pointed it out. She burst into tears, and the guy next to me said, "Way to make her feel insecure, douchebag." FML

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

#20952633
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37088) - you deserved it (3395)

On 11/10/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by fuck you, bitchcake (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, somebody broke into my car, just to steal the obviously fake $1,000,000 bill hanging from my rear-view mirror. FML

#20951747
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45554) - you deserved it (11252)

On 11/09/2013 at 6:27pm - money - by jsyn (man) - United States (Connecticut)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: