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havok87

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havok87

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1528
  • Number of comments : 106
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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havok87's page activity

Visits<b>cookiecake97</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 1:23am<b>Jabberwockyy</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 8:41am<b>anonchick44889</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 12:27am<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 6:23pm<b>MickiJ</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:55pm<b>Dusk_Shores</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 9:27am<b>kmj3637</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 3:33pm<b>noncom</b> - the 04/21/2013 at 11:47am<b>NagainaFier</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 10:52pm<b>SillyGirl4602</b> - the 03/12/2013 at 3:53am<b>Werken247</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 12:52pm<b>Wedees</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 10:02am

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havok87's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered "Fuck it" and left. FML

#20806263
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44186) - you deserved it (3588)

On 07/27/2013 at 12:30pm - love - by Anonycunt (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56243) - you deserved it (9325)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States

Today, I was going so slow in traffic that my GPS asked me if I wanted to switch to pedestrian mode. FML

#20801861
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42303) - you deserved it (7602)

On 07/24/2013 at 9:31pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend and I were furniture shopping. They had miniature versions built of some of the desks. He commented how they were "cute for little kids" to use. They were 6 inches tall. I had to explain to him that they were only models, not real desks. I'm dating Zoolander. FML

#20782878
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35955) - you deserved it (4614)

On 07/14/2013 at 9:07pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

#20780355
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49976) - you deserved it (3987)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML

#20779957
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27992) - you deserved it (54886)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by fuck (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

#20779714
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51281) - you deserved it (4233)

On 07/13/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by speechless - United States (Indiana)

Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML

#20767385
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55074) - you deserved it (7754)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by hamburger - United States (Michigan)

Today, as I was enjoying a nice fish salad, my father looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Ahh, salmon. The 'other' pink meat", then winked suggestively at my mother. I don't think I can ever eat fish again. FML

#20763590
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58326) - you deserved it (4595)

On 07/04/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by ugh (woman) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML

#20762781
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65633) - you deserved it (5692)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by OnPlanetVenus (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I woke up from an extremely intense and pleasurable wet dream. This wouldn't have been bad, had it not been about Velveeta cheese. FML

#20762710
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45210) - you deserved it (9000)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by idk ask freud - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was taking some clothes downstairs to wash, when my mum stopped me. She accused me of sleeping around and trying to hide something, since she did the washing yesterday. She made me admit in front of the whole family that I'd been "surprised" by a case of diarrhea. FML

#20761546
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40022) - you deserved it (2683)

On 07/03/2013 at 12:19pm - health - by ToiletTroubles (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML

#20755283
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48897) - you deserved it (3135)

On 06/30/2013 at 12:21am - misc - by whipplewhip - United States

Today, the weather was so hot that I couldn't stop sweating profusely while using the restroom. Ever slipped off the toilet seat and hit the floor hard due to ass-sweat? Not a pleasant experience. FML

#20750694
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47518) - you deserved it (5886)

On 06/27/2013 at 4:27pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

#20749135
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57793) - you deserved it (6475)

On 06/26/2013 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by the_lonely_life - United States



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