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happyface92

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happyface92

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  • Number of visits : 1598
  • Number of comments : 2
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happyface92's favorite FMLs

Today, I had botox injections to stop my face sweating so much. Now the sweat is almost gone, but my facial expression seems to be stuck on "baffled." FML

#18189475
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10912) - you deserved it (32297)

On 11/07/2011 at 11:41pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had botox injections to stop my face sweating so much. Now the sweat is almost gone, but my facial expression seems to be stuck on "baffled." FML

#18189475
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10912) - you deserved it (32297)

On 11/07/2011 at 11:41pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

#18188542
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30629) - you deserved it (2523)

On 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm - work - by lprocter1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML

#18187794
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5603) - you deserved it (48722)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by farhia97 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML

#18187794
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5603) - you deserved it (48722)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:14pm - misc - by farhia97 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at work I asked a cute, albeit slightly large customer, her name. Being hard of hearing, I thought she said "Porky" and asked her about it. Turns out she'd said Courtney. FML

#18136317
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25024) - you deserved it (9436)

On 11/02/2011 at 3:12am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML

#18135742
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28265) - you deserved it (3326)

On 11/02/2011 at 1:06am - misc - by steve-o - United States

Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML

#18129165
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23571) - you deserved it (21592)

On 11/01/2011 at 1:52pm - misc - by bakedplum (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my car broke down because someone stuck a dildo in the tail pipe. I'd parked in my driveway. FML

#18069827
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29045) - you deserved it (3026)

On 10/25/2011 at 1:58am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I proudly presented my research project in class that I've worked for day and night for 3 weeks straight. My teacher fell asleep. FML

#18067100
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23351) - you deserved it (3065)

On 10/24/2011 at 9:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I saw a father and son playing football in a car park when I was on my way to work. The ball rolled towards me so feeling nice I kicked it back to them. Turns out it went straight through their car window. FML

#18044190
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22989) - you deserved it (6025)

On 10/22/2011 at 4:34am - misc - by tom0441 - Reserved

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16941) - you deserved it (46130) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51954) - you deserved it (16578)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I tried to hint to my husband that we needed a new washing machine. I mentioned that we got our current one way back on our wedding day. He replied, "Yeah, and I got you too." FML

#17999890
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25154) - you deserved it (7182) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/16/2011 at 5:08pm - love - by poluxe - France

Today, while reading over my sent application email to a job I have been trying to get, I found out my brother had put "Heil Hitler!" as my signature. FML

#17996037
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35547) - you deserved it (4991)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:15am - work - by Unemployed - United States (Oregon)



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