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happyface92

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happyface92

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  • Number of visits : 1386
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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happyface92's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that getting drunk and attempting to take a dump out of a second-story window is a very bad idea. FML

#19069104
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5577) - you deserved it (35829)

On 02/13/2012 at 9:55pm - misc - by michael (man) - United States

Today, my bra burst apart in the middle of class. I then had the privilege of asking my male teacher if I could borrow his stapler to put it back together. FML

#19067640
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26314) - you deserved it (3866)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by chlolivia (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, I noticed that I have gained enough weight to give me back boobs. FML

#19040950
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11058) - you deserved it (30144)

On 02/10/2012 at 11:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had a technical skill test as a nurse. My objective was to help the patient defecate, but my opening sentence came out as: "Hello, I'm Jan. I'm here to help you take a shit." FML

#19030539
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20604) - you deserved it (9295)

On 02/08/2012 at 10:24pm - work - by Silver_Samurai (man) - Netherlands

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

#18946444
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21490) - you deserved it (9635)

On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML

#18897054
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23793) - you deserved it (6801)

On 01/24/2012 at 5:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was kicked out of a comedy club for laughing too loudly. FML

#18877531
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29563) - you deserved it (7041)

On 01/22/2012 at 3:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my job at a luxurious retirement community was terminated when I ran over an old lady with my work golf cart. FML

#18852472
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7882) - you deserved it (46119)

On 01/19/2012 at 10:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

#18744677
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49188) - you deserved it (46254)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:36am - intimacy - by omgwhyme (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while helping my father build a shelf, I suggested that we should probably use the instruction manual. He suggested I should probably shut the fuck up and do it his way. FML

#18738481
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26853) - you deserved it (13990)

On 01/07/2012 at 7:12pm - misc - by Jman6295 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML

#18728006
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (4835)

On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I tried exercising. My whole house shook. FML

#18691343
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24616) - you deserved it (12810)

On 01/02/2012 at 10:47pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30931) - you deserved it (2395)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I talked to my dad about joining the military. He got up, laughed, and said, "As if the army would accept a pussy like you." FML

#18524767
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29790) - you deserved it (6004)

On 12/16/2011 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)



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