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happydolphin

Offline (the 01/30/2016 at 9:09pm) | Search for a member

happydolphin

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2067
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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happydolphin's page activity

Visits<b>debmalyaroxx</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 2:48am<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 12:29am<b>JD1147</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:33pm<b>PinkPoshling111</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 5:26pm<b>Wrex</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:34am<b>christian1509</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:06pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 5:03pm<b>Jay_FTW</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 12:18am<b>mcmuffinman1</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:33am<b>tayymeds</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 9:45pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:59am<b>addictedtojuice</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:45am<b>Claytonioo</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:34am<b>MWidderAUDI</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:24am<b>kneesocks</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 5:37pm<b>dk1991</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 10:04am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 9:55pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 7:43pm

happydolphin's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of happydolphin's badges

happydolphin's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm doing an architecture course in China. My boss asked me to create a lamp shaped like a shrimp. FML

#21521055
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17595) - you deserved it (2145) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2016 at 5:38pm - work - by Anonyme - China (Shanghai)

Today, after six weeks of dealing with various exterminators, my roommate and I were about to toast to what we were told was a wasp-free room. That's when we noticed several much smaller wasps flying around. Not only is our wasp problem not solved, but our room is a wasp breeding ground. FML

#21483142
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21458) - you deserved it (1345)

On 10/22/2015 at 8:18pm - animals - by OhWait - United States (New York)

Today, I was trying to sleep in the car, and when I went to rest my face on my fist, our car hit a bump and I ended up punching myself in the face. FML

#21429093
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23318) - you deserved it (3941)

On 06/20/2015 at 3:03pm - misc - by Bengemon825 - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a calf kicked a needle straight into my arm hard enough to make me stab myself. The good news is I'm now fully vaccinated for cow diseases. FML

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

#21371903
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38785) - you deserved it (4384)

On 03/10/2015 at 3:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I received a rejection letter from a job I desperately wanted. Yesterday, the job offer I'd been stalling on in while waiting for news about this one expired. FML

#21367239
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26994) - you deserved it (9507)

On 03/03/2015 at 12:18pm - work - by badtiming (woman) - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, while laughing at a jogger that fell down while running, I choked on my French fries. They had to give me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

#21366627
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14985) - you deserved it (51697)

On 03/02/2015 at 3:40pm - health - by teapotrevolt - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

#21364648
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34046) - you deserved it (4079)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

#21355623
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29974) - you deserved it (3604)

On 02/13/2015 at 10:49pm - love - by FMAhole - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, in thanks for my assistance, a customer recommended me a plastic surgeon who could "really help with that face." FML

#21304340
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29497) - you deserved it (2427)

On 11/23/2014 at 5:27am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I'm old enough to be looking at houses to buy, but not old enough to get past the idea that they might be affordable because they're haunted. FML

#21300362
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27866) - you deserved it (5814)

On 11/16/2014 at 10:07pm - misc - by boo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after visiting friends for the weekend, I took the wrong train home. It was going in completely the opposite direction. I've now missed the last train back, will miss work tomorrow and have just been asked to vacate the train station. I'm 120 miles from home. FML

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

#21282367
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36356) - you deserved it (7514)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:49am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)



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