happyapy

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Offline (the 12/22/2014 at 1:01am)

happyapy

1Fucked!

happyapy
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1788
  • Number of comments : 55
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About happyapy : Feel free to send me a message! Tell me something interesting or just plain cool. I'm absolutely awful at prompt replies, but I will respond... eventually. If you can't think of something to say, one can never go amiss with physics.

happyapy's page activity

Visits<b>atl2003</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 2:27pm<b>dandee_one</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 12:07am<b>analise1998</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 6:11am<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 11:25am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 9:49am<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 11:46pm<b>sweetkitten69</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 2:04am<b>saywhat08</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 1:24pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 4:38pm<b>Jaredphamtom</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 3:08am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 10:08pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 8:34pm<b>WubStep_</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 10:11pm<b>CaptMurdock</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 7:15pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 11:13pm<b>UnoriGal</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 7:18pm<b>tacocatishere</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 6:58pm<b>jacquesromualdez</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 12:30pm

Fucked!<b>analise1998</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 12:11pm

happyapy's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of happyapy's badges

happyapy's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in the cafeteria when I noticed a new worker cleaning a table. As I passed her, she looked up and smiled at me. Thinking she was pulling a funny face, I jokingly crossed my eyes and smiled back. She looked hurt and continued working. Later, she served me my lunch. She was actually cross-eyed. FML

by crosseyed / 06/10/2009 at 3:42pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Work

Today, I had a 3rd date with a great guy. Over dinner, he told me that he wanted to see more of me. When I agreed, he pulled out his schedule book and started to tell me he was dating 5 other women besides me. He then told me what week in the "rotation" would be mine. He wasn't kidding. FML

by shescomfortablynumb / 06/05/2009 at 3:49am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, was my wedding night. We had decided to wait until marriage to have sex. When I undressed and smiled at my new wife, she burst into tears and cried, "please don't make me do this." FML

by honeymoondisaster / 05/23/2009 at 12:44am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML

by TwinDad / 05/14/2009 at 11:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend bought this hot pink Chanel nail polish. Bored, she thought it would be funny to paint my nails. I finally gave in and let her paint my toe nails. After she left, my buddy calls to to see if I can give him a ride. I forgot I had a swim meet today. FML

by Anonymous / 04/30/2009 at 12:52am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up with really dry, chapped lips. Still in bed, without my glasses on, I sleepily reached down into my purse for some chapstick and applied it. Upon awakening later I realized I had mistaken a mini Sharpie permanent marker for chapstick. I have a job interview today. FML

by pinkblankets / 04/18/2009 at 9:55pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut MandMs at work, when I exclaimed "oh cool, they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes, but I eventually realized that I was looking at a regular MandM sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers' uncontrollable laughter. FML

by StewPit / 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was woken up to my mom playing the piano awfully. I screamed down the stairs "you suck, stop playing!" Turns out it was my 5 year old cousin playing a recital. For my entire family. FML

by christinabear / 04/15/2009 at 1:14am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2009 at 5:40pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I found a bell that had been tied into the tassel of my ski hat by my twin sister as part of a longstanding prank war between us. I'm deaf and have apparently been jingling like an elf for over a week. FML

by hipprep83 / 03/20/2009 at 1:40pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year old girl and we were eating chocolate covered nuts. She kept on chewing the nuts and wondered where the chocolate was. I told her to taste the chocolate you suck on the nuts. Then her parents came home and the first thing she said was "I learned how to suck nuts!" FML

by nutsucker / 03/08/2009 at 3:08pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my wife and I were driving to the gas station, she let me out before she pulled up to the pumps because I had to buy some things from the store. I returned to see my wife proudly filling the tank. Smiling, she told me that diesel was cheaper than regular gas. We don't own a diesel car. FML

by Damn_her / 03/04/2009 at 7:04pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Love

Today, I kneeled down to tie my shoe and sneezed, nailing my face off of my knee and breaking my nose. FML

by ouchmynose / 02/17/2009 at 9:43pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my wife, in her magnificent wedding dress, had her period during the ceremony. How did I find out? The same way everyone else did. FML

by noname / 12/13/2008 at 12:48am / Love