Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hannahmarieeee

Search for a member

hannahmarieeee

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 18 November 1997 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 146
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About hannahmarieeee : imm 15 i have fuckingg crazyy frandss ndd most of the shit tht happens to meh is from them or wen imm wiff them .!! But imma bad mother fucker amen.!

hannahmarieeee's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of hannahmarieeee's badges

hannahmarieeee's favorite FMLs

Today, I got sent to the principal's office because my Dad decided that instead of signing his name, he would sign, "Ms. Bigtits", because he wanted to make sure the teachers were paying attention to what their students handed in. FML

#20088535
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21305) - you deserved it (1474)

On 09/25/2012 at 7:20pm - misc - by PerpetuallyHappy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, as a pizza delivery guy, I was forced to see yet another naked 200 pound teenage girl with a serious case of body acne. They're starting to give me nightmares. FML

#20081849
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26189) - you deserved it (3035)

On 09/21/2012 at 6:57am - work - by scarred for life - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

#20079475
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59285) - you deserved it (3047)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my daughter and her boyfriend excitedly told me that after months of trying they are finally pregnant and that I'm going to be a grandmother. This would be great news if they weren't 15. FML

#20077962
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43882) - you deserved it (6343)

On 09/18/2012 at 4:20pm - health - by GMD (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I collected my students' notes in class to check them. One girl, who is always drawing weird anime crap in her sketchbook, turned in just one piece of paper that read, "FUCK YOUR CLASS." FML

#20076781
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17616) - you deserved it (19216)

On 09/17/2012 at 8:21pm - work - by Mrs. Teacher (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

#20071617
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23454) - you deserved it (1929)

On 09/14/2012 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at Starbucks after having a rough day. The old man beside me was talking to his friend. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him point at me and say, "See that beautiful girl over there?" Flattered, I listened closer, until he finished his statement with, "She's gonna die." FML

#20031501
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23814) - you deserved it (1942)

On 08/20/2012 at 5:14am - misc - by scared to leave the house (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to bail my boyfriend out of jail. He got arrested because he was tugging his man-meat in the drive-thru at a McDonald's. FML

#20030745
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24840) - you deserved it (4884)

On 08/19/2012 at 10:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my co-worker told me I should stop smoking cigarettes because it makes my breath "smell like shit" and makes my teeth look as yellow as corn. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. FML

#20029161
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23816) - you deserved it (8057)

On 08/19/2012 at 12:19am - work - by pridekills - United States (Florida)

Today, a homeless lady decided she needed to change underwear in the middle of the sidewalk. I turned around just in time to see her legs in the air with no undies on. I can never eat salami again. FML

#19988661
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20290) - you deserved it (2051)

On 07/28/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by em from Cali - United States (California)

Today, as a romantic gesture, my boyfriend gifted me an origami vagina. FML

#19833560
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24108) - you deserved it (4093)

On 06/23/2012 at 10:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML

#18785359
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25189) - you deserved it (4837)

On 01/12/2012 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anon (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I woke up to someone screaming "FIRE!" When I sat up, my face went right into my room-mate's ballsack. Apparently it was funny. FML

#18625590
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33631) - you deserved it (5322)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:53pm - misc - by ericane27 - United States

Today, while standing completely still at Walmart, I was hit by a drunk man on a Jazzy Scooter. He laughed, said it was an accident, gunned the scooter and took out two more people. FML

#18459479
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23013) - you deserved it (2274)

On 12/08/2011 at 9:48am - misc - by skidmark (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

#18451653
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12970) - you deserved it (41183)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:46am - misc - by Notadrinkanddriveidiot - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: