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hannahisthewin's favorite FMLs
by unlucky neighbors / 12/06/2013 at 4:36am / China (Shanghai) / Miscellaneous
Today, my wicked mother has been with us for a week. She's already thrown away my daughter's favorite toy, broke my computer, scratched my oak table, stained my most expensive shirt, peed in our bed, and called the attention of the cops by staring at kids in school. She's staying for three months. FML
by longlongwinter / 12/05/2013 at 11:50am / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Miscellaneous
by Chatons / 12/05/2013 at 1:52am / Switzerland / Animals
by happy birthday to me / 12/05/2013 at 12:14am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Awkward / 12/04/2013 at 5:29pm / United States (Washington) / Kids
Today, I got a call from the girl I like. I got very excited so I quickly picked up. As it turns out, she was actually prank calling me, pretending to be a "liposuction telemarketer" but forgot to press *67. FML
by Anonymous / 12/04/2013 at 3:50am / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 11/12/2013 at 2:12pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
by Alice99 / 11/12/2013 at 12:39pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by Pongy / 11/12/2013 at 12:31am / Miscellaneous
by myheadhurts / 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML
by Anonymous / 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up late and had to rush to catch my bus. Upon arriving at school, I was hot from running and took off my sweater. It was then, in a lecture hall with 400 people, that I realised I hadn't put a shirt on underneath. FML
by barebackingit / 11/04/2013 at 2:17pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by don'tdrinkthat / 11/03/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids
Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML
by unknown / 11/02/2013 at 5:10pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids
by Anonymous / 11/02/2013 at 4:23pm / Ireland / Miscellaneous
- Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and… Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any… Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her…