About hamstersFOreal : wassup earthlings im paige
my hobbies r sitting in my snuggie drinkin penguins
i'd be alot happier right now if i had a bagel...
my goal is to be the ambassador of llamas
i can stick 2 icecubes up one nostril dont ask me to show u take my word for it *wink wink*
seriously wheres that bagel??
my mum says hi
i am addicted to harry potter and Mr. filch's cat, Ms. Norris. OMFG that cat is fuckin sexii... confused? ya me too
enough said ..... i think
yea thats enough...
do u like green eggs and ham?
:O
....... nom nom nom
awwww poop ... i wish to be a washing machine...
i see fish and flying flowers in the sky when my mother pees.
AVADA KEDRAVA ... well thats what u get for stayin' on my page nigga. now get the hell off b4 chuck norris decides to kick u off texas... thats right man, chuck norris can do that AND NOW UR DEEEEAD
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, it was my daughter's birthday. She had been wanting a cat for a long time, so I went to the animal shelter and got an orange one. As soon as she saw it, she ran upstairs screaming, "GINGER! GINGER!" She refuses to come downstairs until I get rid of "the soulless creature." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27539) - you deserved it (6169)
On 01/19/2011 at 10:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to a water park, and the fee to get in was $39.95. Once I got in I was really thirsty, so I got a soda and then I hear over the intercom that the park is closing due to a clog in the cleaning system. I paid 43.67 for a soda. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27546) - you deserved it (2751)
On 08/17/2010 at 10:01pm - misc - by Still Dry - United States
Today, my husband discovered that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turned to me and whispered 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moaned. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20303) - you deserved it (13356)
On 08/07/2010 at 9:05pm - intimacy - by Indigo_Kitten (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was on the arm of my couch trying to grab something from the bookshelf, and my boyfriend was below me. I asked, "So, would you catch me if I fell?" He looked back at me, paused for a moment before saying, "How much do you weigh again?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19851) - you deserved it (6712)
On 07/27/2010 at 6:07am - misc - by mauimango7 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was in the shower and I heard my boyfriend walk in. I struck my sexiest pose and when he came in, he looked me up and down and told me, "You look like my mother." Thanks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24861) - you deserved it (3700)
On 07/26/2010 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by dumped (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9138) - you deserved it (85395)
On 07/25/2010 at 5:06am - misc - by spriggs (man) - United States (California)
Today, someone gave me 13 dollar bills. I rejected one because I'm very superstitious about the unlucky 13. Later, I waited half an hour in the car for someone to bring me exactly 1 dollar because I did not have enough for the parking fee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5129) - you deserved it (44260)
On 07/24/2010 at 5:56pm - money - by onedollar (man) - Venezuela (Distrito Federal)
Today, while I was driving my 27 year old boyfriend 8 hours to a Pokémon event, he realized he didn't bring his DS with him. He cried about it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33353) - you deserved it (14883)
On 07/24/2010 at 1:47pm - love - by juli (woman) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13548) - you deserved it (52563)
On 07/24/2010 at 6:53am - misc - by GirlishMan1883897 (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51647) - you deserved it (2705)
On 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States
Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18165) - you deserved it (32112)
On 07/17/2010 at 2:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I decided to buy my Chinese Studies professor a gift from Taiwan. So I bought her a mini-Taiwanese passport that said "Republic of China" on it. As it turns out, it was actually a two-pack of travel condoms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21310) - you deserved it (14424)
On 07/14/2010 at 11:17am - intimacy - by safetyfirst (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Today, my boyfriend wouldn't lick the whipped cream I had on my nipples because "That stuff is full of calories." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33240) - you deserved it (6688)
On 04/26/2010 at 5:58am - intimacy - by Rowden (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I took a picture of my boobs and sent it to my boyfriend, only to realize after I hit "send" that I had sent them to the taxi driver (my last phone call) who had just dropped me off at my house. He won't stop calling my phone now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9789) - you deserved it (38737)
On 04/17/2010 at 7:37pm - intimacy - by BoobSicle (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, as my boyfriend was unbuttoning my pants to go down on me, he looked at me and said in his best robot voice, "caution, contents may be stinky." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35004) - you deserved it (18162)
On 04/16/2010 at 12:03am - intimacy - by shmelly - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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