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hamburgerjung

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hamburgerjung

1Fucked!

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  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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hamburgerjung's page activity

Visits<b>santosb1</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 1:12am<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 9:21pm<b>kukumber</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 5:13pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 5:07pm<b>ManiSwagBoii</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 7:53pm<b>KK3137</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 6:43pm<b>happy2468</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 10:10pm<b>JesterMester</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 5:37pm<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 5:12pm<b>silencebabyy</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 2:24pm<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 1:34pm

Fucked!<b>qwertsarecool122</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 3:21am

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hamburgerjung's favorite FMLs

Today, at my sister's wedding, she and I had a plan that she would purposely throw the bouquet to my girlfriend, then I would propose in front of everyone. When the bouquet landed in my girlfriend's lap, she screamed, "Ew, no way" and threw it to someone else. FML

#21430908
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28880) - you deserved it (3107)

On 06/23/2015 at 10:48pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, once again, I explained that yes, I'm Russian. No, I'm not a communist. No, I don't pray to a picture of Putin riding a bear. And no, I don't have any vodka on me. FML

#21408243
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30652) - you deserved it (3025)

On 05/11/2015 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my two managers, both over 30, were arguing over whether or not butter is a sauce. FML

#21401688
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26409) - you deserved it (2659)

On 04/29/2015 at 10:49am - work - by Goatczar - United States (Utah)

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

#21397883
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41905) - you deserved it (2834)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went on a date with a girl I like. Afterwards, I drove her home, and we just sat there awkwardly. I thought she wanted to kiss me but was nervous, so I jokingly said "What're you waiting for? Christmas?" I guess she took that as a "Get the hell out", because she broke into tears and left. FML

#21395685
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22768) - you deserved it (30334)

On 04/18/2015 at 10:38am - love - by fuck (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I read my 10-year-old sister's diary. That's how I found out about her disturbingly detailed plan to murder me, make it look like suicide, date my boyfriend after helping him get over my death, then marry him. FML

#21395572
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38838) - you deserved it (5031)

On 04/18/2015 at 3:01am - kids - by Anonymus (woman) - Sweden

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45694) - you deserved it (3348)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, for the second time, I had an argument with my mother about whether William Shakespeare was a real person or not. FML

#21376501
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25160) - you deserved it (2261)

On 03/17/2015 at 4:35pm - misc - by ohno - United States (Michigan)

Today, the principal of the school I teach at told me she's not interested in re-hiring me because sometimes I wear a hoodie. FML

#21371721
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83) - you deserved it (4626)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:28am - work - by schoolsucks - United States (Colorado)

Today, my date dropped me off at home and briefly met my parents. As he was leaving he whispered into my ear, "I want to feel the inside of your vagina with the outside of my penis." My parents totally heard. FML

#21349904
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39613) - you deserved it (5040)

On 02/04/2015 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by MIB thingy please... (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend and I were trying something new. I ended up with a shard of glass in my back and a concussion. Don't have sex on a glass table. FML

#21335128
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18195) - you deserved it (26485)

On 01/11/2015 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, a girl from class screamed at me in public for hugging the guy she likes. She threatened to take me out if I didn't "back off". That guy is my boyfriend. FML

#21333251
112 comments

Today, I went into labor and got my husband drive me to the hospital. Instead of staying by my side, he rushed back home for a World of Warcraft raid. His excuse? His friends were counting on him and they'd be pissed if he let them down. FML

#21330209
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40958) - you deserved it (5078)

On 01/03/2015 at 8:30pm - health - by Lady Cuntsnatch of Fallopia (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while at work at a call center, I got a call from an elderly man who needed a new credit card because he'd accidentally cut up his own card instead of his wife's. Trying to be funny, I said "Trying to keep her in line, eh?" Turns out his wife had just died. FML



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