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hallix

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hallix
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 May 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 1023
  • Number of comments : 98
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 36 posted

About hallix : I always fall in love with fictional characters. And then they die.

hallix's last visitors

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hallix's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of hallix's badges

hallix's favorite FMLs

Today, my therapist told me to write down my secrets in an envelope and symbolically burn them. My secrets included stories of my rampant sex life, drug use, a suicide attempt, and the overpowering hatred I have for my family. I've managed to misplace the envelope somewhere back home. FML

#15091616
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24111) - you deserved it (18604)

On 02/23/2011 at 4:07pm - misc - by Elle (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend fed me chocolate chip cookies with laxatives in them because he was concerned I did not poop enough. FML

#15012596
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32704) - you deserved it (3642)

On 02/17/2011 at 3:08am - health - by clashgurl8449 -

Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML

#14930837
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6986) - you deserved it (65209)

On 02/11/2011 at 12:51am - intimacy - by Zibby -

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67080) - you deserved it (6317)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got home from working late and decided to write a cute email to my girlfriend since I haven't seen her in two weeks. I was about to finish it off when my door swung open, and in a panic, I opened another tab to hide my email. It was porn. FML

#14743872
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10374) - you deserved it (36520)

On 01/28/2011 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I went to see "Black Swan" with my parents, not realizing that it was basically a porno. So I sat next to my dad while Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman had passionate lesbian sex on a twenty foot screen. And I'm pretty sure I heard the old guy behind us jacking off. FML

#14689182
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32864) - you deserved it (6216)

On 01/23/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my extremely superstitious girlfriend called me and said she couldn't make it to the date I had planned tonight. Her reason? "I sense something horrible is going to happen." I was planning to propose. FML

#14653951
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38370) - you deserved it (3258)

On 01/20/2011 at 8:15pm - love - by fianceeless (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my girlfriend had sex with three different guys in one day. All at a party. A party that I was at. FML

#14035490
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43278) - you deserved it (6109)

On 11/30/2010 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by crushed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

#13661699
373 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58832) - you deserved it (8489)

On 10/31/2010 at 9:30am - intimacy - by Tai - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML

#13624785
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23182) - you deserved it (3252)

On 10/28/2010 at 8:07am - animals - by scratchpost (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, in preparation for a presentation at work, I decided to take a handful of vitamins to fight my cold. As I was putting the bottles away, I noticed one of them was a laxative. FML

#13496892
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7961) - you deserved it (28558)

On 10/18/2010 at 8:44am - work - by sofakingweetodit - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mom added me on Facebook. She wrote on my wall, for the whole world to see, "Why are you swearing on the internet?! You're grounded". FML

#13273071
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19460) - you deserved it (17957)

On 10/01/2010 at 3:39am - misc - by rosmaizura (woman) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML

#13241865
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33815) - you deserved it (2142)

On 09/28/2010 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I finally decided to do regular biology rather than honors biology, thinking honors would be too hard. My first day in regular biology, my lab partner asked me whether a rock was alive or not. FML



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