Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

haleychellex

Offline (yesterday at 6:28pm) | Search for a member

haleychellex

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2678
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About haleychellex : Bios aren't my cup of tea, dollfaces. x

haleychellex's page activity

Visits<b>Syruphs</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:50am<b>tyler_jay</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 10:08am<b>xxrush2112xx</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 6:07pm<b>smoothcriminal69</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 4:21pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 11:46am<b>ArtemisPrime</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 9:35am<b>miwako</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 10:18am<b>hoffmanam</b> - the 02/07/2013 at 6:13am<b>CaBur</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 3:28pm

haleychellex's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of haleychellex's badges

haleychellex's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a club to celebrate New Year's Eve. A cute guy came up to me at the bar and asked my name. I thought my 8 year long dry spell was finally about to end. I smiled and said "Chrissy!" He said "That's a whore's name!" and wandered back off into the crowd. FML

#21327860
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31584) - you deserved it (2979)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:39pm - love - by cakestar9 (woman) - Ireland (Clare)

Today, I met my new roommate. I hadn't even gotten her name yet, because the first thing she said to me instead was that she wanted to hang her confederate flag on the wall. I'm black. FML

#21326235
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35514) - you deserved it (4288)

On 12/29/2014 at 12:00am - misc - by okay17 - United States

Today, my parents threw a hissy fit calling me ungrateful and disrespectful for wanting to do laundry and clean at home, instead of going out to their friends' house for dinner. They also disconnected the Internet to punish me when they left. I'm 20 and visiting home on a college break. FML

#21326232
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30187) - you deserved it (2692)

On 12/28/2014 at 11:55pm - misc - by justwantedtounpack - United States

Today, I got a gift-wrapped package in the mail from my racist mother-in-law. She's always hated me, so I thought it was a bit strange. Inside was a squirt gun and a note telling me to take my "black ass" for a walk around a police station with it, followed with a smiley face. FML

#21325871
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40270) - you deserved it (2984)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom and I went to exchange a massive stuffed animal, which was meant for my niece. I was carrying it when I saw a really hot guy looking at me funny. My mom snickered and told him that I never go anywhere without "George". FML

#21325643
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31134) - you deserved it (2882)

On 12/28/2014 at 1:52am - misc - by thanks a lot mom - United States (California)

Today, I was yelled at in public for staring at a guy in a wheelchair. I was staring 'cause he was so good looking. FML

#21322556
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34146) - you deserved it (4263)

On 12/23/2014 at 6:28am - misc - by anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, on a first date with a guy, I spilled ice cream all over my pants. He bought me some more, and as I was thanking him, he said, "You've never had a guy treat you right, have you?" I said no and started crying. FML

#21322290
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39196) - you deserved it (4359)

On 12/22/2014 at 8:28pm - love - by Soulara89 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I sat on the bus for 3 hours stuck in traffic trying to ignore the old lady sitting next to me discreetly masturbating. FML

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

#21315694
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35454) - you deserved it (4284)

On 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I wore what I thought was a hideous sweater from the thrift store for an ugly sweater contest. I've gotten more compliments on it than anything else I've ever worn. I can't even succeed at failure. FML

#21315542
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28470) - you deserved it (3228)

On 12/11/2014 at 11:10am - work - by anyoldnamewilldo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my daughter wasn't feeling well, so we allowed her to sleep in bed with us. She snuggled right up with my husband. I felt a little jealous until she turned around and cuddled with me, just long enough to throw up all over me. She then flipped back over and snuggled with her dad. FML

#21314569
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33457) - you deserved it (3602)

On 12/09/2014 at 5:39pm - kids - by SickMaMa - United States (New York)

Today, I confessed to my roommate of 4 years that I'm in love with her. Her response? Sticking her tongue out at me and blowing a raspberry. FML

#21314515
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28240) - you deserved it (3797)

On 12/09/2014 at 4:19pm - love - by thatsnice - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML

#21314442
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32410) - you deserved it (5315)

On 12/09/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, while fasting for a medical test, my blood sugar became so low that I had heart palpitations and passed out. My doctor's advice? Fast, so he can run more tests. FML

#21314271
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29080) - you deserved it (2405)

On 12/09/2014 at 4:39am - health - by fucking moron (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom texted me and asked what I was up to. In response, I joked, "Dancing on the dining room table, waving dad's Calvin Klein's in the air, and shooting bullets into her bedroom floor." Not only did the cops show up, but now I'm grounded for two weeks for being, "deceptively believable." FML

#21314000
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31703) - you deserved it (5368)

On 12/08/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by #goodbyelife - United States



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: