About haleychellex : Bios aren't my cup of tea, dollfaces .x
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I dropped our daughter. Our hypothetical daughter. Represented by a stuffed owl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40372) - you deserved it (3821)
On 04/03/2013 at 9:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, my neighbours came to yell at me as they could hear my "shit music" through my window during the afternoon, so I turned it off. They then began to play their definition of "quality music" into the late hours of the night. I was listening to the Beatles. They blasted Nicki Minaj. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45925) - you deserved it (3277)
On 03/31/2013 at 2:24am - misc - by BornInTheWrongEra (woman) - United States
Today, I came home to visit my family for spring break, only to realize that I'd left my phone in my apartment. After a 2 hour drive back, I discovered my boyfriend with my neighbor. He panicked and pretended to be sleepwalking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38288) - you deserved it (1772)
On 03/31/2013 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Maybe I'll stay longer than spring break. - United States (Virginia)
Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33168) - you deserved it (12588)
On 03/28/2013 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was on a girls' trip in Las Vegas. I met a cute guy at a bar and we were going back to his hotel room together. On the way up, he asked me how much it would cost. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32511) - you deserved it (12664)
On 03/28/2013 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by Hooker (woman) - United States
Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27894) - you deserved it (11995)
On 03/28/2013 at 4:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)
Today, my girlfriend confided in me that she wanted to try bondage. Since I trust her, I said sure. After I was tied to the bed, she tickled me until I pissed myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37565) - you deserved it (7373)
On 03/21/2013 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by ldn (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)
Today, I finally got to meet my boyfriend's parents; it turns out that his mum is my therapist. I've just spent an entire morning telling her how confused I am about my sexuality. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39436) - you deserved it (4428)
On 03/21/2013 at 6:25am - misc - by me (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28933) - you deserved it (11760)
On 03/21/2013 at 6:01am - intimacy - by meeee (woman) - United States
Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML
I agree, your life sucks (35779) - you deserved it (3480)
On 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Tired (man) - United States
Today, we had to re-live sex ed in my college biology class. Unlike in middle school, nobody giggled incessantly. However, the guy sitting next to me stared at me intensely for nearly the whole three hour lecture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28183) - you deserved it (2651)
On 03/20/2013 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my fiancée and I showed my mother-in-law a picture of the location at which we'll be holding our wedding reception. It's a beautiful waterfront building overlooking the ocean. She looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Looks like a good place to commit suicide." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27650) - you deserved it (1693)
On 03/14/2013 at 10:40am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Latvia
Today, I decided to come onto my husband to switch things up. When I started kissing and trying to undress him, he pushed me off, saying "What're you doing? Jeopardy's about to start." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32168) - you deserved it (3601)
On 03/05/2013 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by married an old man - United States (California)
Today, my wife finally came home from deployment. Apparently, in the military she really built up some muscle. When she saw me at the airport, she picked me up like a baby and spun me around in her arms a few times. I'm a little scared of her now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32141) - you deserved it (6768)
On 03/04/2013 at 2:36am - love - by married to wonder woman (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend ripped my panties trying to get them off. Not off me, off himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35888) - you deserved it (3623)
On 03/04/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by nopanties (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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