About haleychellex : Bios aren't my cup of tea, dollfaces. x
haleychellex's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
haleychellex's favorite FMLs
Today, while with a large group of friends, my best friend started talking about my struggles with dating and intimacy. I quietly asked her to stop talking about it, as it was personal and I wasn't comfortable with everyone else knowing. Her response? "Um, it's really none of your business." FML
by guitarki / 04/26/2015 at 2:49pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
by RBergman / 04/25/2015 at 4:05pm / United States (Wyoming) / Love
by Anonymous / 04/25/2015 at 1:32pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/23/2015 at 1:04pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, it was my 18th birthday and I was told I couldn't get the night off work because a party of 34 had booked into the restaurant. It turned out my family had come in to 'celebrate' by making me wait on them. They were a nightmare, thought it was hilarious to be difficult, and didn't tip. FML
by Anonymous / 04/23/2015 at 8:28am / United Kingdom (Dundee City) / Work
Today, I started getting really bad chest pains at work. I googled it and the internet convinced me I was having a heart attack. Scared for my life, I started to dial for an ambulance when I let out the biggest fart you could ever imagine. Turns out it was trapped gas. FML
by Not dying. / 04/21/2015 at 3:55am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Health
Today, my mother-in-law asked me when my fiancé and I were going to start having children. When I told her we weren't planning on having any, she went on a tirade about how selfish and cold I am for denying her precious grandchildren. Now she hates me. FML
by ChildFree / 04/20/2015 at 7:55pm / Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad) / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/19/2015 at 11:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Camera / 04/17/2015 at 12:56am / United States (California) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/15/2015 at 10:41pm / Australia / Animals
by anon / 04/13/2015 at 8:51pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was asked to prom by the same guy who "accidentally" cut off a chunk of my hair in class and with whom I haven't had a conversation in my life. When I politely declined he said, "You'll regret this". FML
by scared4myhair / 04/11/2015 at 9:53pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, for the first time in my life, a girl showed interest in me. She sent me a text message saying she wanted to come over and fuck my brains out. This would've made me the happiest guy alive, if only she weren't my extremely drunk sister. FML
by Anonymous / 04/11/2015 at 4:55pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML
by fuck right off / 04/04/2015 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/04/2015 at 8:53am / United States / Love
- Today, my 9 year-old daughter had really bad constipation. When I took her to the doctor, he had to… Today, my Breaking Bad obsessed boyfriend actually used the phrase "I am the one who cocks." during… Today, while having sex on the couch with my single neighbour, a beam in the couch broke. Not even…