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halcyon93

Offline (the 05/23/2015 at 8:06pm) | Search for a member

halcyon93

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 November 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 320
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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halcyon93's page activity

Visits<b>swmmrrnr</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 9:23am<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 5:41pm<b>xadoringx</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 1:21pm<b>TeddyBunny</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 12:08pm<b>TheGolfGTI</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 10:17am<b>dylanger16</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 8:43am<b>clairesucks</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 2:41am<b>cainightroad</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 12:46am<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 12:05am<b>NessieIsNotACat</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 11:39pm<b>seifsoliman</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 10:17pm<b>nour_a</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 7:30pm<b>thejoker_jack</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 6:59pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 5:27pm<b>mip_92</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 5:14pm<b>pocky90</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 6:35pm<b>GabrieLives</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 5:13pm<b>Helen_1988</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 6:03pm

Fucked!<b>dylanger16</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 2:43pm

halcyon93's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of halcyon93's badges

halcyon93's favorite FMLs

Today, I am still finding glitter in my ass crack after a concert last night that had a confetti cannon. Thanks Marilyn Manson, I feel so metal now. FML

Today, my boyfriend managed to orgasm by humping my leg. I'm beginning to think I am dating a puppy. FML

#21363602
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31600) - you deserved it (3795)

On 02/25/2015 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by failuretolaunch2 - United States

Today, just to win a bet against my mum that he could make me scream like a bitch, my dad faked his own suicide. He went the whole mile: fake blood everywhere, fake gun, yelling "Goodbye!" and playing a loud gunshot sound effect from his PC, everything. My dad won; my underwear lost. FML

#21339686
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39463) - you deserved it (3587)

On 01/18/2015 at 4:58pm - misc - by pissed out pants (man) - United Kingdom

Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML

#20405418
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30221) - you deserved it (8616)

On 12/18/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by Dog_Lover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML

#14248345
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31722) - you deserved it (3610)

On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I were having some fertilization problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said "mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

#814298
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73113) - you deserved it (4848)

On 04/05/2009 at 9:32am - health - by manlyman (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was instructed by my boss to welcome the 2 new foreign business partners since I am the only one who could speak their language. When they arrived I greeted them in their language. One of them scratched his head and asked his companion in plain and clear English, "What did he say?" FML

#45177
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33826) - you deserved it (4537)

On 02/15/2009 at 1:21am - misc - by Salaryman (man) - Philippines (Rizal)



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