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gurr57

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gurr57
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  • Number of visits : 663
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gurr57's favorite FMLs

Today, I was leaving the grocery store when an old woman started yelling at me for not holding the door open for her. She accused me of being "everything wrong with the younger generation". It was an automatic door. FML

#20937007
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42805) - you deserved it (2819)

On 10/28/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Greg (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML

#20936891
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38380) - you deserved it (2992)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:18pm - misc - by Asshole hornet - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her, and if so, what. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML

#20936378
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25220) - you deserved it (37448)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:58am - love - by BaconLover - Japan

Today, my fiancée of 2 years and mother of my son, who is also pregnant with our second son, commented on how lucky two friends getting married were to have found each other. I said that we're just as lucky. She responded, "No. They actually love each other." FML

#20936067
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41997) - you deserved it (3437)

On 10/27/2013 at 8:41pm - love - by failure (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to the doctor to see why my walking pneumonia wasn't getting any better. It had. I've just somehow managed to also contract mono... while sitting home, alone. FML

#20935493
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35965) - you deserved it (2278)

On 10/27/2013 at 10:30am - health - by BadLuck (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents at a family dinner. There was plenty of alcohol on offer, as is normal at our get-togethers. She got blind drunk and ended up crying to my mum about how I can't please her because I have a small penis and my oral sucks. FML

#20933730
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50067) - you deserved it (8584)

On 10/25/2013 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Dick the Greater (man) -

Today, I had to call a plumber out to clear a blockage in our bathroom drainpipe. After coming back from work later in the day, and after a tearful confession from my wife, I found out that pipe wasn't the only one he snaked. FML

#20932505
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52712) - you deserved it (3258)

On 10/24/2013 at 4:06pm - misc - by soon to be divorced (man) - United States

Today, I saw a wasp on the ground, apparently injured and unable to fly. It was being mobbed by ants and looked certain to die, so I stamped on the ants to save its life. At this point it sprung up, stung me, then flew off. FML

#20932403
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31859) - you deserved it (22828)

On 10/24/2013 at 2:04pm - animals - by MBean (man) - Anguilla

Today, my girlfriend of a year denied in front of everyone that we ever dated. FML

#20930973
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47974) - you deserved it (4472)

On 10/23/2013 at 11:42am - love - by Zkroger (man) - United States

Today, I had an anxiety attack when I learned that my favorite book series is coming to the end. I had to leave the store and sit in my car. FML

#20930715
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34021) - you deserved it (7362)

On 10/23/2013 at 12:43am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my dog got out of the house. I was running after him and remembered the old "pretend you're hurt" trick. I got on the ground, and cried out as if I was hurt. My dog just kept running. FML

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35432) - you deserved it (9973)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, as a science teacher, I did a science experiment in front of a class. One of my students asked me if it was "photoshopped." He was being serious. FML

#20930096
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40983) - you deserved it (2717)

On 10/22/2013 at 10:24am - kids - by jdawn99 - United States (Kansas)

Today, I opened up to my parents about my depression. Their response was to have a very heated discussion about whose fault it was. FML

#20929825
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37243) - you deserved it (2818)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:44am - health - by Anonymous - Chile (Region Metropolitana)

Today, I was assigned to fill in for a French teacher who was out sick. I had asked the class to name some French-speaking countries. I called on one girl and she replied, "Uh, Europe. That's, like, the only other one, right?" Nobody disagreed. I'm filling in for the rest of the month. FML

#20929522
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39600) - you deserved it (2454)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:40pm - work - by :| - United States (Pennsylvania)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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