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gummybears99

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gummybears99

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11680
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gummybears99's page activity

Visits<b>Toonice45</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 2:18am<b>rnarshmallow</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 6:37am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 1:25am<b>capper44</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 2:02pm<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 2:51am<b>thatdangmexican</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:14pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 5:46pm<b>SWC_Penguin</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 8:18pm

Fucked!<b>Toonice45</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 8:29am

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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gummybears99's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought a large ice cream cake. No, there's no occasion, but I did ask the cashier to write "Happy Birthday" on it, just so she wouldn't know I was going to eat it all myself. FML

#21252624
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35128) - you deserved it (10287)

On 09/05/2014 at 8:13pm - misc - by tbee - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend was about to sneeze. To avoid getting his new tablet wet, he chose to sneeze right into my face instead. FML

#21252384
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37396) - you deserved it (3758)

On 09/05/2014 at 12:17pm - love - by anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, my younger sister ran into my room, telling me someone was trying to break in. We were home alone, so she went to hide as I took a crowbar and followed the intruder. Just as I was about to swing, he turned around: it was my dad. I had to explain to my sister that burglars don't have keys. FML

#21251987
61 comments

Today, my cat decided to use my bowl of rice krispies as his litter box. FML

Today, I was walking my dogs when a woman at a bus stop quite rudely exclaimed, "Keep those mutts away from my kid". I replied just as rudely that I wouldn't want them anywhere near her dirty sprog. It was then we both realised she was a customer that I regularly talk to at work. FML

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45775) - you deserved it (3695)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I told my physiotherapist a funny story. She got so entertained that she started giggling and twisted my broken arm. The pain was worse than when it broke in the first place. FML

#21251280
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35177) - you deserved it (3670)

On 09/03/2014 at 5:30pm - health - by svenska75 (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

#21250887
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47740) - you deserved it (6198)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by very punny (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML

#21250726
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54532) - you deserved it (3001)

On 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by SadAndDeaf -

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45847) - you deserved it (9211)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

#21250455
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39021) - you deserved it (9653)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:32am - intimacy - by ihatejasonderulo - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

#21249886
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35964) - you deserved it (3190)

On 09/01/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by s0728 - United States (Texas)

Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML

#21249696
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41082) - you deserved it (3911)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:59pm - misc - by mayoshampoo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML



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