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gummybears99's favorite FMLs
by bleue / 04/23/2015 at 8:27am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Kids
Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML
by woof? / 04/19/2015 at 1:09pm / United States (California) / Animals
by Anonymous / 04/19/2015 at 11:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/18/2015 at 12:45pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, I had to have a cervical biopsy. The doctor said I would feel slight cramping as she scraped cells from inside the cervix. I guess by "slight cramping" she meant I would shit, throw up, and then pass out. FML
by khaoslife / 04/17/2015 at 11:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Health
by Keladrylady / 04/17/2015 at 8:47pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy
Today, I invited a guy I've been crushing on for ages to my house, and I really wanted to make a good impression. We were sitting in the living room having drinks when my cat came in, dragging a pair of my dirty underwear and dropped them right in front of us. FML
by HM / 04/16/2015 at 9:10am / United States (New Mexico) / Animals
by anon / 04/13/2015 at 8:51pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML
by Anonymous / 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Sarah / 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love
Today, I was driving and someone was following me across the city and wouldn't let up, so I drove past my house, thinking it was a stalker. Eventually I lost them on the highway. It wasn't until I'd gotten back home that I remembered that my 'stalker' was a coworker I'd invited over for lunch. FML
by Distracted / 04/09/2015 at 4:11pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Work
Today, I got a 'Good Morning' text from my boyfriend. Since I hadn't gotten one of those in a while, I thought it was rather nice. That is, until I saw the picture that accompanied it. It was of him, sitting on the toilet and taking a shit. FML
by Anonymous / 04/09/2015 at 11:10am / United States / Love
by burnswhenipee / 04/07/2015 at 8:47pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
by therewasnocurtain / 04/06/2015 at 4:07pm / United States (Idaho) / Intimacy
Today, I saw one one of my cat's hairs on my sweatpants and wanted to remove it. It wasn't a cat hair, but a pubic hair that has found its way through my panties and sweatpants while being still attached to me. FML
by PeppermintPenny / 04/06/2015 at 9:54am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Intimacy