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gummybears99

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gummybears99

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  • Title : Miss
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  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3667
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gummybears99's page activity

Visits<b>Austrand22</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:07pm<b>capper44</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 2:02pm<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 2:51am<b>thatdangmexican</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:14pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 5:46pm<b>SWC_Penguin</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 8:18pm

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gummybears99's favorite FMLs

Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML

#21272641
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34546) - you deserved it (9155)

On 10/07/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Waterfalls (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while on vacation, my parents called to inform me that my best friend had died in a car accident. Why? To trick me into tearfully confessing my love for him. It worked. FML

#21272324
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47206) - you deserved it (3860)

On 10/06/2014 at 9:14pm - love - by whywouldyoudothat - United States (Arizona)

Today, I told my boyfriend about how I was a test tube baby. He looked at me with confusion before asking, "But if scientists made you, surely you'd be really attractive and talented and stuff?" FML

#21272259
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37982) - you deserved it (3752)

On 10/06/2014 at 7:47pm - misc - by thanks babe - United Kingdom (Shropshire)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a massage. I guess I hit the spot, because he muttered, "Please marry me" into the pillow. Considering we've been going out for years and had spoken about marriage before, I stopped in my tracks. He stammered, "Oh, I mean... Not like that. Will you keep going?" FML

#21272255
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34995) - you deserved it (3643)

On 10/06/2014 at 7:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while cuddling in bed with my drunk boyfriend, he kissed me softly then told me under no circumstances would he ever marry me. Then kissed me again. FML

#21272098
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39371) - you deserved it (3860)

On 10/06/2014 at 3:46pm - love - by kittenfish8903 (woman) - United States

Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML

#21270711
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40417) - you deserved it (8552)

On 10/04/2014 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by SadMother - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my allergies flared up and I started sneezing. I guess my girlfriend was having a bad day, because she lost her shit and started telling me how annoying I am and how I can never do anything right. I'm not sure if we're still a couple, because she stormed out and won't answer my calls. FML

#21270617
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35149) - you deserved it (2716)

On 10/04/2014 at 11:17am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, I tried kissing my boyfriend on the tip of his nose. He sneezed mid-kiss and head butted me. Now there is just an awkward silence. FML

#21270556
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32654) - you deserved it (3855)

On 10/04/2014 at 8:11am - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have a quickie in the car. We had left a window open so it wasn't too hot, and I was holding onto the edge of the window, fingers hanging over. In the midst of it all, my boyfriend managed to close the window by hitting the button. My finger is broken. FML

#21270463
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33023) - you deserved it (9622)

On 10/04/2014 at 1:43am - intimacy - by manymisfortunes - Canada (Quebec)

Today, a customer was looking for some decking materials. I took her around the store and pointed out some nice plywood, noting that it's also fire-retardant, which might interest her. She got pissed off and bitched me out for supposedly calling her a retard. FML

#21270214
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31396) - you deserved it (2617)

On 10/03/2014 at 5:13pm - work - by hopeless (man) - Canada

Today, I overheard my brother telling his friend that having sex with a girl who's on the pill gives the guy female hormones and "turns you into like, half-chick, half-dude." He was serious. How am I related to this moron? FML

#21270200
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32925) - you deserved it (2435)

On 10/03/2014 at 4:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out I'm allergic to condoms. Which would be great if my girlfriend wasn't allergic to birth control. FML

#21270163
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42453) - you deserved it (3627)

On 10/03/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by oncehipjr (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a round of applause. Too bad it was from my thighs as I went down the stairs. FML

Today, I asked a passenger what he wanted to drink. When he said marijuana, I started making pot jokes. He really asked for mineral water. I was given a drug test when we landed. FML

#21269829
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29749) - you deserved it (10251)

On 10/02/2014 at 9:55pm - work - by stewardess - United States (Texas)

Today, my little sister had her second son. She is 31 and she named her sons after her favorite television characters, Sam and Dean Winchester. She has made it her life goal to make sure her husband never finds out. FML

#21269654
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29935) - you deserved it (3794)

On 10/02/2014 at 4:29pm - kids - by mykodu - Canada (Ontario)



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