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gummybears99

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gummybears99

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  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3245
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gummybears99's page activity

Visits<b>Austrand22</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:07pm<b>capper44</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 2:02pm<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 2:51am<b>thatdangmexican</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:14pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 5:46pm<b>SWC_Penguin</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 8:18pm

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gummybears99's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my physiotherapist a funny story. She got so entertained that she started giggling and twisted my broken arm. The pain was worse than when it broke in the first place. FML

#21251280
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31473) - you deserved it (3114)

On 09/03/2014 at 5:30pm - health - by svenska75 (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

#21250887
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42115) - you deserved it (5198)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by very punny (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML

#21250726
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48107) - you deserved it (2450)

On 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by SadAndDeaf -

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40316) - you deserved it (7702)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

#21250455
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31586) - you deserved it (7411)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:32am - intimacy - by ihatejasonderulo - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

#21249886
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32723) - you deserved it (2775)

On 09/01/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by s0728 - United States (Texas)

Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML

#21249696
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37521) - you deserved it (3372)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:59pm - misc - by mayoshampoo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my goat decided my hairstyle was so last season and restyled it for me with his teeth. FML

Today, after years of wonderful flying experiences, I boarded a flight and took my seat only to find a baby sitting in front of me, behind me, and to the right of me, and across the aisle from me. All of whom decided to cry in unison. It was a 9-hour flight. FML

#21249416
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46432) - you deserved it (3530)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:34am - misc - by MLeguillon - United States (Missouri)

Today, while eating cotton candy, a drunk person came up to me and said "HEY! COTTON CANDY!" And bit me. FML

#21249322
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36113) - you deserved it (2683)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, at my dining job, my boss told me the food was "technically illegal to serve," air quotes and all. FML

#21249316
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32200) - you deserved it (2388)

On 08/31/2014 at 9:56pm - work - by dining - United States (Iowa)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46360) - you deserved it (3789)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, my boyfriend was entertaining himself by shoving tampons up his nose and seeing how far across the bed he could blow them. This man is the father of my son. FML

#21248639
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34829) - you deserved it (8664)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:11pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40453) - you deserved it (9436)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I was called in over speakers at the airport. The man who was speaking clearly and nearly burst out laughing when he said my name. Soon, a few people around also snickered when they heard it. I had to wait five minutes before I could casually stand up. My last name is Bastard. FML

#21248318
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41028) - you deserved it (3208)

On 08/30/2014 at 4:35am - misc - by poorbastard (man) - Canada (Quebec)



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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