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gummybears99

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gummybears99

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  • Number of visits : 4661
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gummybears99's page activity

Visits<b>Austrand22</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 10:07pm<b>capper44</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 2:02pm<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 2:51am<b>thatdangmexican</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:14pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 5:46pm<b>SWC_Penguin</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 8:18pm

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gummybears99's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML

#21315734
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19721) - you deserved it (24988)

On 12/11/2014 at 6:13pm - work - by IHateSchool-.- - United States

Today, since my finals are starting tomorrow, I made a joke about setting my math books on fire. I laughed. Friends laughed. Parents laughed. Guess what subject just managed to actually get in touch with my scented candles? FML

#21315641
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25011) - you deserved it (5293)

On 12/11/2014 at 2:55pm - misc - by not laughing anymore - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my son got in trouble at school. The kids had to solve a problem by determining whether it was better for "Edna" to repair or replace her AC unit. He said Edna is an "old person's name" and she was "probably going to die soon anyway", so she shouldn't do either. FML

#21315591
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26474) - you deserved it (3176)

On 12/11/2014 at 1:10pm - kids - by MedStudent90 - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I wore what I thought was a hideous sweater from the thrift store for an ugly sweater contest. I've gotten more compliments on it than anything else I've ever worn. I can't even succeed at failure. FML

#21315542
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27605) - you deserved it (3197)

On 12/11/2014 at 11:10am - work - by anyoldnamewilldo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I thought it'd be fun to kick open one of those unisex bathrooms in my workplace. I'm not sure who was more surprised, me or my boss who was in there taking a dump. FML

#21315499
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13293) - you deserved it (33266)

On 12/11/2014 at 8:26am - work - by unlucky (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, it's the last night before a concert. Today is also the day my brother pawned my clarinet for drug money. FML

#21315391
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30643) - you deserved it (2007)

On 12/11/2014 at 12:44am - money - by noshow (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, one of my classmates asked the teacher to postpone her presentation because she had to study and the teacher happily agreed. When I approached her, the teacher started yelling at me because postponing deadlines is irresponsible. I just wanted to make sure we didn't need to bring our book. FML

#21315114
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25391) - you deserved it (1796)

On 12/10/2014 at 4:49pm - misc - by WhereforeArtThouJustice (woman) - Portugal

Today, my daughter wasn't feeling well, so we allowed her to sleep in bed with us. She snuggled right up with my husband. I felt a little jealous until she turned around and cuddled with me, just long enough to throw up all over me. She then flipped back over and snuggled with her dad. FML

#21314569
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31437) - you deserved it (3253)

On 12/09/2014 at 5:39pm - kids - by SickMaMa - United States (New York)

Today, I told my boss I have a sore throat. He replied, "Well, don't take it so deep next time." FML

#21314442
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31575) - you deserved it (5261)

On 12/09/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I asked my dad why we didn't have any baby pictures. His response was, "They got lost in the flood of '93." I was born in '95. FML

#21314190
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29774) - you deserved it (2202)

On 12/09/2014 at 12:45am - misc - by mn167109 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mom texted me and asked what I was up to. In response, I joked, "Dancing on the dining room table, waving dad's Calvin Klein's in the air, and shooting bullets into her bedroom floor." Not only did the cops show up, but now I'm grounded for two weeks for being, "deceptively believable." FML

#21314000
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31111) - you deserved it (5335)

On 12/08/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by #goodbyelife - United States

Today, I enjoyed the soft caressing touch of the person I'm attracted to. It would have been even better if he weren't simply stroking my arm hair in amazement at its superior length and density. FML

#21313670
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29161) - you deserved it (4271)

On 12/08/2014 at 9:12am - love - by lovethateuropeanblood (woman) - Japan (Osaka)

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to find that I had slept through my house getting robbed. FML

#21313515
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30375) - you deserved it (3661)

On 12/08/2014 at 12:03am - misc - by BedazzledAlpaca (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a long, philosophical explanation about how he doesn't love me, but we should still have sex. FML

#21313490
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31625) - you deserved it (2703)

On 12/07/2014 at 11:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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