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gummybears99

Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 10:15pm) | Search for a member

gummybears99

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11700
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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gummybears99's page activity

Visits<b>Toonice45</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 2:18am<b>rnarshmallow</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 6:37am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 1:25am<b>capper44</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 2:02pm<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 2:51am<b>thatdangmexican</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:14pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 5:46pm<b>SWC_Penguin</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 8:18pm

Fucked!<b>Toonice45</b> - the 06/23/2015 at 8:29am

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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gummybears99's favorite FMLs

Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

#21520327
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23170) - you deserved it (1561)

On 01/28/2016 at 3:39am - animals - by sweetie808 - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was taking a dump at work. I had my two-way radio attached to the back of my belt. When I stood up and pulled my pants up, I managed to send the antenna straight up my butt. FML

#21520186
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19941) - you deserved it (4351)

On 01/27/2016 at 7:29pm - misc - by poopsicle (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up with a pounding headache. My wife tells me that last night I woke up from a nightmare, screaming, tried to run away and knocked myself out running headfirst into the bedroom wall. So she put me back to bed and went back to sleep. FML

#21519974
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20571) - you deserved it (1979)

On 01/27/2016 at 7:02am - health - by oliver (man) - United States

Today, I was locked out of my house. With no other available option, I decided to try and ninja my way through a window. However, as it turns out, I would make a terrible ninja. I now have a sprained ankle and a broken window. FML

#21519916
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15788) - you deserved it (4789)

On 01/27/2016 at 12:20am - misc - by valene5687 - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad told my girlfriend that she's the son he never had. FML

Today, my girlfriend wasn't kidding when she said that if I hit her cervix just the 'right' way during sex, she'd puke. I was on the bottom. FML

Today, a girl in my class threw a temper tantrum. Why? Because she wanted my seat. We're in high school. FML

#21519471
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19381) - you deserved it (1281)

On 01/25/2016 at 10:02pm - misc - by 99jellybean (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was leaving the house to go on a date. My dad stopped me at the door and said confidently, "Tear that pussy up, son." I'm gay and my dad knows that. FML

#21519039
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22133) - you deserved it (3971)

On 01/24/2016 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, I was shovelling snow out of my driveway and broke my shovel. So I tried cleaning the driveway with a garbage lid. That broke too. Now I'm out snow shovel, AND a garbage lid. FML

#21518975
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17452) - you deserved it (4472)

On 01/24/2016 at 5:21pm - misc - by Snowman (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I twisted my knee while cutting firewood with my grandpa. The pain was so crippling, I fell over screaming. His response? "Quit your bitching, I had my kneecaps blown off in Vietnam. They had to stitch 'em back on." He's never been to Vietnam, or even out of the country. FML

#21518868
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24159) - you deserved it (1968)

On 01/24/2016 at 12:10pm - health - by fuckoffgramps (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out my family refers to my room as "the virgin cave". FML

#21518755
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21517) - you deserved it (2569)

On 01/24/2016 at 12:40am - misc - by Dexter_39476 (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, one of my professors left a cabinet door open whilst teaching class. The compulsion to get up and close it was so strong that I could barely concentrate on what was being taught. FML

Today, my 17 year old told me he wanted to pursue a career in art. Knowing he's extremely talented at drawing, I congratulated him and told him to pursue that dream. A few hours later I learn that he's been arrested for spray painting graffiti dicks all over a school wall. Well, he's famous now. FML

#21517961
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21524) - you deserved it (2024)

On 01/21/2016 at 9:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, two teen girls got into a shouting match at the table next to mine at the food court. Sensing a fight brewing, I got up to leave. I stood up just in time for one of the girls to throw her tray, which missed her target and hit me in the head. FML

Today, while I was taking a shower, my boyfriend came into the bathroom to ask me a question. When I got out of the shower, I was greeted with a horrifying cutout of Michael Jackson. I fell backwards, shattering the glass shower door. I needed stitches. FML



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