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The Thumb strikes back
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Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I cut my own bangs. I pulled too much hair to the front and ended up giving myself a mullet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2564) - you deserved it (5442)
On 06/18/2013 at 12:28pm - misc - by kittykittyrun (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Today, I was planning on having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, so I asked my roomate to stay out of our apartment. About half-way through, my roomate blared "The Eye of the Tiger" from the other side of the door. My girlfriend laughed so hard that we couldn't finish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8706) - you deserved it (1049)
On 06/18/2013 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I attempted to ask a girl out by doing a flash mob and singing for her in the store where she works. Turns out, she suffers from anxiety and the overwhelming amount of attention caused a panic attack. No, I didn't get a date. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17918) - you deserved it (6399)
On 06/18/2013 at 11:02am - love - by Well, crap (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)
Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21578) - you deserved it (1940)
On 06/18/2013 at 9:06am - work - by Not a day over 35 (woman) - United States (Alaska)
Today, my husband was in our newborn's room, holding and talking to him. I guess he forgot the baby monitor, because I overheard him say, "Wanna know a secret? Daddy kills people." I really hope he was just quoting Dexter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26627) - you deserved it (1679)
On 06/18/2013 at 1:01am - kids - by imarriedanaxemurderer (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31274) - you deserved it (3859)
On 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my grandparents went around bragging to people that I'm taking my STD test. They meant to say SAT. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31779) - you deserved it (1791)
On 06/17/2013 at 1:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37145) - you deserved it (1820)
On 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by hinting (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went to a new bar with friends. After arriving I became extremely gassy; I planned a smooth release during the loud music. Little did I know the bar occasionally dips its music to hear the guests singing. When the music turned off all eyes turned to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29272) - you deserved it (9068)
On 06/17/2013 at 9:55am - health - by nomwar (woman) - United States
Today, I lost my virginity. Not only did my parents somehow find out, they posted about it on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34390) - you deserved it (6946)
On 06/17/2013 at 1:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my daughter had ice cream while I was napping. She didn't want me to know so she put the bowl in the trashcan and put the spoon in the garbage disposal and turned it on, because she thought it would make the spoon disappear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29565) - you deserved it (3660)
On 06/17/2013 at 12:33am - kids - by cherbear1000 - United States (Maryland)
Today, I went fishing with my dad. I figured, since we were out on the dock, I may as well get rid of my farmer's tan. I fell asleep in the sun and woke up to a fishing net draped over me. I now have a fishnet pattern down the front of my body. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28538) - you deserved it (8065)
On 06/16/2013 at 9:39pm - misc - by jhughes1997 (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my daughter found out what happens when my husband watches Mythbusters and doesn't heed the disclaimer to "Not try this at home." He feels bad about her cut face, but says he's proud he can throw a playing card that hard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28135) - you deserved it (2108)
On 06/16/2013 at 7:58pm - kids - by Married2handsome - United States (Florida)
Today, in public, a homeless guy looked me in the eyes and started wanking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29256) - you deserved it (2412)
On 06/16/2013 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by scarredforlife - United States (New York)
Today, I woke up to my bratty younger sister cutting through my hair with a pair of scissors. I now look like a freak, and my mum bitched me out for being angry, all because my sister claimed she'd been sleep-walking. Her demented smirk said otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36469) - you deserved it (1929)
On 06/16/2013 at 2:49pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)
Monday 17 June 2013
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